Children exposed to drugs?

[Fatherforever]

I recently received information that my ex wife's boyfriend may be involved in drug activities (ie dealing etc.) I am the custodial parent of our two sons ages 3 and 5. I am worried about their living situation when they are at their mother's house as her boyfriend now lives with her as well. I don't know what they are being exposed to. I am worried if something were to happen with the boyfriend when my children are around, that CPS might get involved and they will be taken by the state.

I am afraid of what could happen if CPS gets involved, especially now that I have knowledge of her boyfriend's background. Apart from that she isn't a good parent, doesn't feed them properly, no rules, etc.

I need some info on what I need to petition the court to setup a time when they can be over there when she has the children and get a good idea of what kind of situation they are in.

Is this something that needs to be done through a lawyer or can I do this myself to get things started. I am really concerned with this new information and hope that I can get some peace of mind and clarification.

Thanks!

~Fatherforever

[knightryda01]

First you need proof. Possible call cps and have them investigate. Call a lawyer and ask opinions.

[Fatherforever]

I don't know if I stated the situation clearly, but I DON'T want CPS involved. I am trying to take care of any possible situation so that CPS is never involved. CPS is too quick to jump to conclusions and take the children out of parents custody while they "investigate". There have been way too many CPS incidences, especially here in Washington state where false allegations are made and before anything is investigated, the children are pulled out of their safe, healthy environment and tossed into the system, while they deliberate.

I am more looking for an evaluation of her parenting skills, along with making sure their environment with her is a healthy one.

If the day comes that her boyfriend is busted for drug use or whatnot, and the children are in the house at the time, they will not hesitate to get the children out of the situation. I never want them in that situation. And if CPS were to learn that I had knowledge of this activity, but still allowed the children to go there, that could put me in a bad situation as well. People are too quick to get CPS involved.

[ocean]

You cant file something that says you are allowed to go into her house. You can ask that she be drug tested. or If the boyfriend has been arrested before and convicted you can file to say that he is not allowed to be there on visits.
You have to prove neglect on her part...

[MixedBag]

And I'd call the cops and relay what you know TO the Narcotics Unit.
 
 

[Fatherforever]

 

You cant file something that says you are allowed to go into her house. You can ask that she be drug tested. or If the boyfriend has been arrested before and convicted you can file to say that he is not allowed to be there on visits.
You have to prove neglect on her part...

No, I wouldn't want to be allowed into her house, but instead getting someone who's job it is to evaluate the situation in there.

I don't know how to find out if her boyfriend has any convictions, do they make those records public?

And I'd call the cops and relay what you know TO the Narcotics Unit.

The situation with my ex seems to be going from bad to worse, first it was just about her not helping pay anything, and not following the schedule. Then to her neglect and bitterness towards our children, now learning some history about her boyfriend? I feel like in our 7 year marriage, I never knew her...

~Fatherforever

[Fatherforever]

Another bit to add...

Yesterday, my girlfriend took the boys to the dollar store to pick out a toy. She explained that she picked out a pack of playing cards for herself. When my five year old son saw the cards, he asked my girlfriend if she was buying "smokes". She was taken a back and asked where he had heard that term. He explained that "mommy" and her boyfriend both have "smokes" and that is what mommy's boyfriend calls them. BTW, my ex wife is currently undergoing cancer treatment and finished up chemo in September and she's still smoking... I have to say I'm a little angry at how careless she is with herself and with what the children are exposed to.

~Fatherforever