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what are step parents called?

Started by twistedtmama, Jun 29, 2011, 06:21:58 PM

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fight4him

So dad is a crappy dad...he is STILL dad. He always will be.  Even abused children love their parents. I don't know why, but they do. So rest assured, your son loves this man. Your son calls stepdad  "dad" because YOU and more than likely he, have always called him daddy. Children don't just start calling random men daddy. They call men that when they are told that is your daddy. You aren't really giving this man a chance to be a good daddy. I can only imagine how you talk to him and about him. I don't blame him for not wanting to come around really. But I do agree he should step up to the plate. But you have to give him that opportunity, and you clearly aren't. One post you talk about how never brings things back and you had to spend 200 on clothes to replace what he ruined or lost. That is alot of clothes. He must have had him more than you are saying to waste that much. Or maybe you sent that much with him for one night and he tossed it all? Not likely.  Then the next post you are saying he never sees him.

We will never know the true story with you. Even if dad (the real one) came on here and defended himself we would never get the true details. BUT we do recognize someone who is trying their best to alienate the other parent, and we have no sympathy for those who do that. You have NO idea what you are doing to your son. I'm sure he seems fine to you, but rest assured, this is going to cause him problems. And when he grows up and realizes dad is not the bad guy, he IS going to blame you.

Kitty C.

VERY eloquently put, tigger..........
Handle every stressful situation like a dog........if you can't play with it or eat it, pee on it and walk away.......

twistedtmama

You say I don't know whats best for my son, I love how people on the internet know whats good for my child, I have tried to work tt out with bio dad, and he doesn't have money issues he makes 500 dollars a week, thats far from lacking in money, I have tried my best to make him see his son, if I have no car and license theres not much I can do, he is able to take him whenever he wants I told him just give me a call he never does, so its not my problem, also no my son does not love him don't tell me what my son does and does not do you don't know him, so really honestly if your ex's are passing your kids you deserve it because all you are, are know it alls when you know crap.

tigger

Quote from: twistedtmama on Jul 29, 2011, 08:57:01 AM
he doesn't have money issues he makes 500 dollars a week, thats far from lacking in money,

$500/wk around here is nothing.  A one bedroom apt is $800.  That would leave him $1200 for CS, gas, car payment, food, electricity, water, and other bills.  That IS having money issues. 

And I'm done with this thread.  You asked a question and we answered.  You didn't get the answer you wanted and decided to argue us out of our answers.  Collectively, we have well over 100 years of experience with divorce/separation/children's relationships with NCP's and this is compared to your experience of MAYBE 5 years.  With age and experience comes wisdom . . . only a fool rejects wisdom . . .
The wonderful thing about tiggers is I'm the only one!

Kitty C.

I second that, tigger.................

But you better wait to respond until everyone has given their last comment, twisted..............so you can be sure to get the last word in............
Handle every stressful situation like a dog........if you can't play with it or eat it, pee on it and walk away.......

MixedBag

wash, rinse, repeat.

So he's a crappy dad, he's still DAD, and nothing else.

USE all the adjectives you want, he's still dad.


texasstepmom

any man can be a father but it takes a real man to be a dad. i have two ss that both call me mom. they are both teenagers and i have never told them that is what they need to call me. i started out being called by my first name and yet they both have chosen to call me mom because that is what they see me as. i think thiat everyone has blown this thread out of perportion. were all entitled to our opinions and thats all any of us give each other.

ocean

texas- your situation is not the same, your skids grew up calling by first name then you "earned" being called mom due to your situation. My girls call my DH by his first name and now close to 5 years, they will say "my parents" depending on who they talk to. Their father is NO where around so again different situation.

This poster had her infant/toddler calling bio dad by first name since the time he can talk. If he was around enough to have him say a name it should of been dad or your father. (and slowly explained to him as he grows up he has two "dad"'s a dad and step-dad who we call XX.

I teach in the schools and many kids in my class come from all sorts of family situations. When holidays come up, I try and accommodate each child's situation. Some have to make two projects so they have a gift for their mom and step-mom. Same thing at fathers day, Christmas, Hannukkah, etc...
Her son just needs to understand the dynamics of his family so he is not confused.

If you look at the other forum, this poster is asking about mediation, the father is taking her to mediation so he is trying to be involved...or at least acting that way...

MixedBag

Bingo!  not the same....sooooo not the same

Waylon

Quote from: twistedtmama on Jul 27, 2011, 09:18:47 AMNo I cannot atleast agree to this, I am not going to agree to something I don't agree with just to pacify you, everyone is entitled to there own opinion. Now I am tired of discussing this topic, so topic closed.

You're the problem here as much as the other parent may be.
If you can't bring yourself to be honest enough to see this, then I'd say you've got problems no message board can fix.
The trouble with reality is that there's no background music.