First, do not speak to Grandma or anyone at pick up. Talk to child and police officer. IGNORE any talk about you and get in car and leave. Ignore most comments on text. Let phone calls go to voicemail.
Call child's dr and ask to speak to dr on phone. Ask how daughter was and that you received his "note" that she was not well enough to come to your house for Thanksgiving. Be nice but firm.
Next go to the hospital and get child's records from that day. You probably will pay a copy charge. See what it says.
Then go to family court and fill out modification to parenting/visitation plan. Ask that: "father requests a few lines be added to
parenting plan to ensure their time together and make exchanges easier.
1. Father will pick up child, even if sick, unless a dr writes a note stating child can not travel and the reason why. Father will be told immediately. If child is in hospital, father will have visitation time without mother/grandmother present for 2 hours each day of confinement. If child is in serious condition, father will be able to stay at hospital and see child as much as mother/grandmother.
2. Any parenting time misses due to sickness will be made up the following weekend from xx to xx.
3. Father requests Thanksgiving 2012 from xx time to xx time, since mother/grandmother refused to allow child to come even when child was well enough to come 24 hours later with no medication.
4. At exchanges, there will be no speaking to either party at all. Mother/Grandmother will stay in car and father will get child and bring child to his car. This exchange will remain at the police station. (if child is old enough, child will walk from one car to another). If/When child is school age, put in that father will pick up from school at dismissal. You can write this now and have it begin with Kindergarten. Put details, father will have custody every other fri...at dismissal...and every wed during the week from dissmisal....time?).
5. All communication will be through text or emails. In case of emergency,mother may text father anytime.
Ignore, and when you have child, enjoy time together. If child sees it, just say, this is between the adults and Ill take care of it later, lets go do...xyz. Remain calm at all times. Go see a counselor for a few months during this crazy time/court. It will get worse until you have a detailed plan and plan that they can not communicate with you. Since you have a RO, see if had 3rd party contact. This means mother can not use grandma to communicate anything to you (except child issues of importance).