18 year old still sleeping with dad.....normal or not?

[mommy nurse]

Baby daddy still does this practice with his 18 year old daughter.  Now it freaks me out that it will also happen to our daughter, 4 especially she has mild autism and cannot really relate anything but sees everything as 'normal'.  He is african american descent so i really have to know if this is culturally-related.

I have so many worries since he has primary custody.  I have her every other weekend, extended from friday evening to Monday AM and all summer, she's with me.  I do not wanna suspect anything but i have seen he grooms more of his 'girls' children more than the boys.  It is weird and bothers me since the CO was made in April.

Suggestions and advice are needed on this issue.  Pending court hearing....

[ocean]

Child should have own bed and that is what child protective services will tell you to. Not their own room, but own bed. Have it court ordered, child will have own bed in both houses.

[DadsCrushed]

I have two daughters and I don't want them sleeping with me for fear that they will take all the covers. The father here should not be sleeping in the same bed with a young adult. Granted my daughters and I have all laid in a bed during a nap or watching television but this is not every day. If he lacks the room at the very least a separate bed but in the same room. Does it really matter that he is African? We are in the United States and tolerance of another culture does not mean acceptance.
 
I do not believe you can obtain a court order for the 18 year old but definitely the 4 year old with a court order to modify or petition for parental conduct.

[mommy nurse]

Child should have own bed and that is what child protective services will tell you to. Not their own room, but own bed. Have it court ordered, child will have own bed in both houses.

Thank you.  This is very helpful.  I will definitely have this critical issue added.  I knew him since his child was only 12.  I knew this was not normal but I never questioned or was scared to be criticized especially from a sociopath. 

[mommy nurse]

I have two daughters and I don't want them sleeping with me for fear that they will take all the covers. The father here should not be sleeping in the same bed with a young adult. Granted my daughters and I have all laid in a bed during a nap or watching television but this is not every day. If he lacks the room at the very least a separate bed but in the same room. Does it really matter that he is African? We are in the United States and tolerance of another culture does not mean acceptance.
 
I do not believe you can obtain a court order for the 18 year old but definitely the 4 year old with a court order to modify or petition for parental conduct.

Thank you so much.  This really relieved me.  I will definitely add this one up.

[mommy nurse]

Another question.  How can i monitor that his compliance to this court order?  Who will check and how?

[ocean]

It won't but when child says she is not in her own bed there, then you can file contempt of court that he is not following court order. If it got to the point that he was not following order, child protective services can be called by you or through the courts and they will go see her living environment and interview child without dad there.

[mommy nurse]

Thank you very much.

[jonnas]

this is not normal

[MixedBag]

I think the advice of ordering a separate bed is on target.
 
I'm not experienced with autism.....so I would tread carefully in labeling this situation.
 
Add to that that they split 4 months ago.....
 
Long term, separate bedROOMS.  Short term....separate beds due to the age and sex difference.
 
But beyond that -- folks, be careful.  k?

[mommy nurse]

I think the advice of ordering a separate bed is on target.
 
I'm not experienced with autism.....so I would tread carefully in labeling this situation.
 
Add to that that they split 4 months ago.....
 
Long term, separate bedROOMS.  Short term....separate beds due to the age and sex difference.
 
But beyond that -- folks, be careful.  k?

Thank you for all the input.  This helped me a lot.

[MixedBag]

your welcome!  And good luck!