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Author Topic: Another summer visitation question  (Read 1423 times)

IceMountain

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Another summer visitation question
« on: Apr 27, 2005, 06:45:24 PM »
My decree allows me 6 weeks summer visitation with my son.  I used 1 week at Xmas. so I have 5 weeks left.  I have to give 30 days notice of when I want to exercise visitation.

Now to my question:  I am an OTR truck driver and this is a new career for me.  I have continued to exercise eow visits with my son, but cannot take 5 weeks off work for the summer visitation.  

My wife, however, does not work summers.  Can 'I' still exercise the visitation?  

My son and my wife have a very good relationship.  He is 7 and wants to play sports here again this summer.  (he participated in his first sports activities last summer.)  My ex has flat out refused saying that he participates in the same 2 activities now so he doesn't 'need' to do them at my house this summer.

My ex is in Iowa, I'm in Wisconsin.

Is there anything I can do?  I know I won't be available every day, but my son still wants to come.  Can she deny this time?


Kboeds

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RE: Another summer visitation question
« Reply #1 on: Apr 27, 2005, 07:51:05 PM »
if it is your court ordered time then she can not deny it. Unless the order specifically states that your son can not be left with anyone else during your time with him. (That would be very unusual)

I will say this, my ex took custody by buying my daughter away from me. 3 months after the custody papers were signed he started working out of state. He is home right now and is planning on leaving again soon for most of the summer.
I am the bio mom and I have to say, the fact that he would fight to get her away from me, only to leave her for months at a time with her SM is total Bull S*** in my opinion. DD saw her BF more when I had custody then she does when he has custody.
I believe that children should primarily be with their birth parents. If you are not going to be available for the 5 weeks, then maybe you could take a shorter amount of time. DD's SM is thrilled to death that she has finally gotten DD away from me and caused life long damage to the realationship between a mother and her daughter. Don't play that game with your son.
I respect that you want to spend time with him and that he wants to come visit, and short periods of time with a step parent are necessary sometimes, but I don't feel that 5 weeks away from his mother and father is in his best interest.

Just my opinions.
KB

IceMountain

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RE: Another summer visitation question
« Reply #2 on: Apr 27, 2005, 09:26:53 PM »
I am not going to be gone for a full 5 weeks.  I will be home on weekends and some days through the week.

I am not trying to play a game with my son!!  My ex is the one playing the game by making my son feel that his relationship with me is 2nd to everything else!  I love my son and want to be able to have access to him every time I am home during the 5 weeks.  I don't want to depend on her doing me any favors by 'allowing' me to see my son when it is convenient for her during those 5 weeks.

I am trying to do what is in the best interest of my son.  To me, that means if I can't be there every day during the 5 weeks visitation, he should be able to spend the visitation with our other family members and in a place where I can have more phone contact with him and where he can still feel close to me.

If you consider that playing a game, I guess I'm out of the loop!  Not all NCP are out to 'steal' custody from the CP... I'm sorry your ex took custody by buying your daughter, but I'm not that guy!

Thanks for your opinion.


Kimberly9

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Yes, you can still exercise visitation
« Reply #3 on: Apr 28, 2005, 04:18:37 AM »
Give notification of the best  5 weeks in your schedule and then exercise the visitation.

No she can't deny the time.

Good luck.

IceMountain

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RE: Yes, you can still exercise visitation
« Reply #4 on: Apr 28, 2005, 07:10:13 AM »
Thank you!!


rm1759

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RE: Yes, you can still exercise visitation
« Reply #5 on: Apr 28, 2005, 10:42:54 AM »
Do you have Right of First Refusal in your custody papers?  If not, then she cannot deny the time.  If you do have ROFR, then you may have a problem, depending on the length of time.  

I had this clause in mine, it read something like "In the event the child will not be with their parent for X amount of hours while in their care, the other parent will first opportunity to spend additional time with child."

IceMountain

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RE: Yes, you can still exercise visitation
« Reply #6 on: Apr 28, 2005, 04:01:27 PM »
My decree is very generic and needs to be redone.  It doesn't include any ROFR clauses, or other similar provisions. These are things we will be attempting to add when I modify next year.  (I have to wait until my schedule is more stable)

Thanks for your input.

 

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