Shared Custody is an issue

[henryt]

I am in NJ and my wife has filed for divorce. She of course filed for Extreme Mental Cruelty. Being that as it may , I have been polite and remain amicable. I still live in the house and am paying all the bills. As time moves on , we are in the Mediation stage. I am asking for equal time with my 3 sons , ages 10,10 and 11 1/2. Yes I have twins. I did not want this divorce but she refused counselling to try and solve issues at hand. Now I am geting offered the Standard every other weekend and Wednesday from school till 8pm. Can anyone help or give advice on where I can get some support with attaining Shared Custody. I have a great relationship with my boys and I don't feel they or I should suffer since this is what she wants. Thanks for any help or contacts.

Henry

[CustodyIQ]

First, it would be to your disadvantage if you move out voluntarily.

You want to be able to show that you have been as much involved, or more, as the mother in raising the boys.  That will give you your best shot at shared/joint custody.

For more in depth tactics, I strongly recommend that you buy the book "Win Your Child Custody War" by Hardwick.  I've got a link to it on my website.  This will help frame your mindset as to approaches and tactics that are important and relevant in family law.

Be sure to keep the book at your workplace or a friends.  Don't bring it into the home.

Finally, carry around a microcassette recorder in your pocket at home.  If there's any argument, whip it out and start recording.  This will help protect you in the event of a false accusation of violence (i.e., a common ploy to remove the father from the home).