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Ugh, don't know how to handle this one...

Started by hisliltulip, Jun 30, 2004, 02:05:55 PM

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hisliltulip

DH is CP.  BM has Wed overnights and every other weekend.

BM and DH get two weeks of uninterrupted parenting time over the summer.

SS (5) spent first two weeks of June with BM.  It has been almost two weeks, he is transitioning finally except for one point.

Whenever he doesn't get his way, the tears start and the screaming, yelling, slamming doors...  "I want to live with my Mom forever, I don't want to be here."  Or "I miss my Mom, I don't want to be here".  HUGE theatrics.

This is NOT the SS I know and love.  He's usually very laid back and happy.  Sure he'll say about once a week that he misses her, but not everyday at least twice a day.

And it's for stupid stuff too.  Drink your milk, brush your teeth, it's naptime, you have to have dinner before you can have a brownie...

So, how do we handle this?  The "I miss my Mom" I can handle.  The "I want to live with her forever, I don't want to be here" gets me.

Help me out here, am I making a mountain out of a mole hill?

Does he just need more time to adjust?

I just want to say, "Why?  Don't you have to drink your milk, brush your teeth, eat your dinner before dessert at Mom's?  Does she never say no?"

Ugh.  Help Help Help!

joni


5 years old is young and he's having trouble expressing himself.  BM may or may not be putting stress on him to make him feel guilty.  BM could also innocently be saying, "I miss you" and that makes the child feel bad.  he probably is having a good time at mom's house.

I know my SD stresses tremendously about not being able to be in two places at the same time.  she's six, she oftens tells me that her heart is not big enough to love everyone.

he may truly be missing his mom and rightly so, I'm sure he does.  doesn't mean it's against you.  validate that he misses his mom and let him know you understand that.  when he settles down, let him call his mom to say hi so he understands that mom hasn't abandoned him.