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EVIL STEP MOM

Started by flewwellin, Jul 13, 2005, 05:42:26 PM

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4honor

#7 was not about "funny" in our case, but if the rules work for your family you are welcome to adopt them and tweak them.

Oddly, "If its not yours don't touch it" works to help keep DS1 out of the refrigerator. I work hard to keep us financially on track. DH works full time and all the overtime he can handle. I do the shopping. The groceries are "mine and 2honor's". If we did not take this stance our solidly built 3 boys would be jello impersonators instead.

A true soldier fights, not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves whats behind him...dear parents, please remember not to continue to fight because you hate your ex, but because you love your children.

flewwellin

Those are really good suggestions!  I have taken them to the most recent ultrasound (July 12th) they got to hear the heart beating the first time they've heard that and they got to see the baby on the monitor, we have 3 pictures from the visit.  I show them pictures of babies (still inutero) on the website "this is kinda what the baby looks like"

I never thought about incorporating the baby into enforcing simple rules but at this point I am desparate!  

As for the bedroom thing, I have to stand strong with that because it is a very strong rule in our house that the "parents" bedroom is completely off limits.  If you give an inch they take a mile.  This really is for their own safety. My husband is into martial arts and collects katana's, (swords) daggers, knives and other things so this is something that will continue to be enforced.  

Thanks for the suggestions.

flewwellin

I will be printing and adjusting these rules ( one girl and one boy) to fit our household but I want you to know that I completely appreciate this response to my post.  Believe it or not it has helped tremendously!  I love #9 although I am not biologically their mom I still have as much say so when they are in my house.  # 6 is a great one too! DH likes to try to make stuff that they both will eat and this usually means two totally different things and then something else for the adults!  

babymakes8

I would honestly appreciate if someone could make up similar rules, for FOUR girls and TWO boys....seriously.  I am not good at that stuff, but I can sure use a list of 'house rules' to go by.


4honor

1. Don't start a fight. You cannot throw the first punch, or the instigating words. A fight can cause physical harm. Those starting fights get spanked. Taunting your brother or sister is the same as starting a fight, but punching the neighborhood bully for taunting them is not.

2. No tattling unless someone got hurt or will get hurt if you don't tattle. If you tattle about "nothing" (she took my toy and won't give it back!) you get in the same trouble as the person breaking a house rule.  The exception to this is someone wanting you to keep a "secret".

3. Mom & Dad's bedroom is always off limits unless a child is specifically called into the bedroom for a specific reason - no one but mom & dad go in the master bedroom. The exception is on Saturday morning we all get ON the bed and cuddle, tickle and catch up on the week. Breaking this rule grounds you off game systems or TV for an appropriate time.

4. No one will act like a sissy in this house. You are strong intelligent kids. No whining, no tantrums, no emotinal outbursts with the intent of getting your own way. You will behave consistent with your gender. Everyone keeps the hair color God gave them until they are grown and out of the house. Fingernails and hair will be kept clean and appropriate in length for your age and gender.  Mom and Dad will determine what is appropriate length for you.

5. If it isn't yours, don't touch it. If you have specific permission to touch it, treat it with respect. If you don't and something happens to it, you are responsible to repair or replace it.

6. You are welcome to eat what I fix or to choose not to eat. You do not have the option of fixing something else -- this is not a restaurant. When I made dinner, I took into consideration any allergies. Your menu choices are "eat" or "starve".

7. Keep your hands and body parts to yourself. You will not intimidate someone else with your body. You will not inflict unwanted affection on a family member. You will not rub body parts on someone else to torment them. You will purport yourself like ladies and gentlemen physically. Don't play with yourself in my living room. Nobody wants to see that. Try the bathroom! While we are at it, you do not need the whole couch sit up and keep your body parts to yourself.

8. Stay out of your sister or brother's room unless it is also your room. Stay out of your siblings items. (see #5)

9. I am your parent. I am not your friend. I do not care if you like me, you will obey anyway.  I will not only allow you to suffer the consequences of your actions, I will discipline you too. I was entrusted by God to bring you up to be MEN and WOMEN, not children. I will do what is necessary to make that happen.
A true soldier fights, not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves whats behind him...dear parents, please remember not to continue to fight because you hate your ex, but because you love your children.

metamorphosis

I completely relate to your situation.  The first summer visitation after my husband and I were married I was pregnant with our daughter.  I was a stay at home mom during that summer with 2 daughters and 2 SS.  It started off as a nightmare, especially since it was the first year the boys were old enough to stay for the full 6 weeks.  (it had only been 2 weeks the previous year.)  Every day I heard "(blank) is better at mommy's house" at least 5 times.  It got better though.
 About the only thing I was able to do to get any rest was to put on a video and lay down on the sofa with them on chairs or the floor right by me.  Obviously it didn't always work, and was only good for about an hour a day, but it was something.  
Also, if you have a fenced in backyard a sprinkler, inflatable pool, or even the hose is a wonderful thing.  I was able to sit and spray them or just watch them.  A lot of times I gave up trying to have any order and just let them put on old clothes and go to town in the mud.  At those ages (3,4,5,&6) it kept them busy and happy as pigs for at least an hour.  Of course then you have a huge mess.
One thing that made it easier in my situation though was that there was 4 of them instead of 2.  If they weren't getting along with somebody, they had 2 other choices to pick from.
Good luck!

flewwellin

Well, I think that it has a lot to do with these pregnancy hormones cause I wasn't nearly as tempermental last summer (I actually cried when they left!) but this summer it's been really stressful and I won't be crying this time that's for sure! I love them dearly don't get me wrong but I am now coming up to my 27th week and am really tired all the time still.  I also have developed a really bad cold so I've been coughing, sneezing, nose draining, etc.  The kids go home a week from tomorrow and the baby will be born before we get them again so I'll have no more pregnancy hormones and the baby will be at least a month old before they come back (it'll only be for like 10 days then though).