MySpace snoop

[Ref]

Ok. I admit it. I snoop on SD's myspace. Shoot, she is 15 and lives a half a country a way. Her mom doesn't talk to DH at all about anything exept "WHERE'S MY MONEY!!" So I justify finding out about SD's life by snooping on her myspace.

BTW: I HIGHLY recommend doing this whether you are a custodial or non custodial. You would be amazed at the stuff out there. (Including not so bright kids posting addresses and phone #'s)

The problem is, SD wrote on her page that she was drinking with this friend that I know is trouble. The first issue is, whenever I tell DH about it, it just frustrates him because there is NOTHING he can do about it. He can't talk to BM and we have to be careful talking diretly w/ sd because she is old enough where we can't physically force her to see us. We can't tell anyone where we got the info because SD might block her myspace from the public, meaning I wont be able to see if she has gotten into worse trouble.

Any advice? I thought of printing out the page and sending it to BM anonymously, but she could follow the postmark.

Thanks
Ref

[Sunshine1]

You could call the school.  They are busting kids right and left that are in school and they posting about drinking, doing drugs, putting pictures of them doing all of that with their friends...etc..  If the school finds out, and she is in some type of sport, she will be given "weeks"  ie, first offense, you missed 2 games or two weeks of play time and after 4 you get kicked out.

How do I know this?  I was given a minor consumption and weeks simply for admitting that I had drank at some point in the day.  Sign up to be her friend, then if it goes private, only her "friends" can see it.

You could also print it, and send it to someone on here that you trust, and have them send it to the school or BM too, either way she is going to go private or not say anything on her space anymore about her extra curriculars.

[4honor]

email me on my web site addy --  follow the contact us link.

website is //www.airjewelry.net

Send me BM's address and I will send it looking like something from School -- though with a Washington post mark BM will be confused.

[dipper]

I snoop too.....my daughter and stepson both made accounts several months back.  Our computer is in the living room, so while they can have some privacy, they never know when someone will be looking over their shoulders.  DH signed up on the site so that he and ss could easily talk since BM was limiting phone calls and making it hard for him to even talk to ss.  What happens?

She tells ss he can no longer get on myspace.  We agree that their is a risk involved - but getting on the internet itself is risky.  By dh having an account, we were able to check out our children's profiles and make sure they didnt have identifying info.

A week ago, my police officer brother called to tell me he had been searching myspace for locals advertising drugs when he came across ss....He was like, "he is claiming to be 26 looking for women..."  I had to laugh!  His cousin put the looking for women on there..and he has age 26 because I tell them not to put their ages.......And even before I knew my brother had seen it, I had them take their town off of the site.

I also asked the kids for their passwords and looked at their accounts last week.  I only look to see who they are talking to and the purpose of the conversation....my daughter is into wrestling and that is all her stuff is........my ss is talking with old schoolfriends as he had to suddenly change schools.  

My brother told me that the chief where he is at made his daughter put in her password...she is a teen and she had naughty photos on there.....he was shocked.....

I only look for stuff that compromises their safety........I want them to have some amount of privacy, so I dont comment on what is on their site.....though I would say something if it was nasty....

[Ref]

Would anyone from florida be able to help me? I think it would be best if I could find someone in the same state.

Thanks
Ref

[catherine]

I don't know what I'd do though.  Seems like a double edged sword.  I think the best bet is to confront SD directly once she comes out to visit you and ask her what is going on in her life.  Do you guys have her for a majority of the summer?

[Ref]

I think the plan is to get SD up for the summer and first tell BM over the phone so she has the oppotunity to see for herself before SD deletes or changes anything. BM will likely call us liars or get really defensive. If she sees herself, maybe that will help. Then I think we will talk to SD alone and tell her that we wanted to talk to her face to face.

We will put the letter idea on hold right now and save the webpages as a word file just incase she changes it.

All I would ask for is that she be banned from hanging out with a couple of the "bad" kids. Problem is, BM has no curfew for SD, she allows boys in the home when she isn't there, etc etc.... Is she rreally going to put her foot down on this?

Yes, we have her for the majority of the summer.

Thanks to all of you! I know where to go if I need help!

Ref

[catherine]

of FL you are in but I'm in Central FL.  While your SD is here, maybe you can get her into a youth program of some kind where she can meet good people for friends and maybe learn a little from someone other than a parent about drinking/underage sex, etc.  Let me know if I can help you search the net for any programs.

[Ref]

BM lives in the panhandle. I am hoping that this early intervention will fix things right up. It will take BM keeping a better eye on SD, so who knows. I guess all we can do is keep her out of trouble over the summer and cross our fingers that  BM will do her part when she gets back.

Thank you so much! I will keep you in mind.

Ref

[skye]

go to a truckstop close by ..ask a driver to mail it for you from another state...give him $5 for his trouble...