Where do I stand?

[good cause]

Greetings!

Facts:

1) My daughter born out of wedlock in Florida (1991).
2) Other than a temporary custody order pending further investigation of a restraining order request back in 1996 (request failed to hold water) AND: other than the original stipulation to establish paternity & support which recognized natural custody w/mother who had child at that time, there exists no formal custody-specific or shared parental orders that I know of.
3) Ex sent child to live with me beginning of year - ex and husband drinking, not able to deal with the combative child.
4) Now ex is arguing to have me send daughter "home" in June for a family reunion. There is no visitation order in effect. June 17th or thereabout will be 6 months residence in this state.

Questions and concerns:

As we work on my daughter's anger and esteem issues, she is prone to balking. Lots of teary displays about going "home" now, the same place she was begging to get away. This makes sense - she's being forced to confront issues and doesn't wish to, would prefer to go back and return to status quo. I'm not going to allow it. Her performance is slowly improving, her esteem coming along with it, but still the frequent attempts to throw the bit. Ex now citing a family reunion taking place at or about the 6 mos marker, stating that I should trust her to send daughter back to me after reunion. My feeling is that ex told she better try to convince me to send child back by then before residency in this state becomes official?

Q1) Absent any court order instructing me to send her home, do I have any obligation to do so? My ex sent her to live with me voluntarily, I have a written note from her stating that the child is in my care and I will be taking care of her medical, school, etc.

Q2) Am I correct in assuming, having read through these forums, that I can petition local courts for decision on custody and visitation, etc, after child has lived with me 6 months?  Are my chances good for positive outcome?

Q3) I continue to pay current CS and arrearage - what obligation does ex have to put CS monies aside while child in my care, pending any court decision regarding custody, etc, as instigated by me in local circuit?

Q4) Child has a pet back "home", has asked that her pet be sent to live with her here - ex refuses. What recourse have we once I file for change of jurisdiction/custody/etc?


Thank you for your time. I hope I have been concise to your liking.


edited to included DOB, line 1

[socrateaser]

>Questions and concerns:

>Q1) Absent any court order instructing me to send her home, do
>I have any obligation to do so? My ex sent her to live with me
>voluntarily, I have a written note from her stating that the
>child is in my care and I will be taking care of her medical,
>school, etc.

Absent a court order granting temporary/permanent custody in your favor, if you retain the child, then the other parent can file a complaint with the DA in her county, and you may be charged with parental abduction/kidnapping.

>
>Q2) Am I correct in assuming, having read through these
>forums, that I can petition local courts for decision on
>custody and visitation, etc, after child has lived with me 6
>months?  Are my chances good for positive outcome?

You can petition your county court for temporary emergency custody now, if you can show that the child is likely to suffer imminent mental or physical abuse at the hands of the other parent. I would definitely give this a shot, if only to try to obtain a court appointed psychologist/evaluator to assess the child's mental state and testify thereto.

Re your second question here, if you have read my forum, you will know that I rarely make predictions about court outcomes. However, if the child is now asking to return to Florida, I'd say, that unless the above-mentioned court-appointed psychologist testifies that the child is in some serious mental distress, that your chances of winning are just about zero.



>
>Q3) I continue to pay current CS and arrearage - what
>obligation does ex have to put CS monies aside while child in
>my care, pending any court decision regarding custody, etc, as
>instigated by me in local circuit?

Until you actually file a motion/petition for a child support modification, the other parent has no legal duty to return any money to you, and in fact, retroactive modification of a child support order is prohibited under federal law, beyond the date of filing for a modification.

>
>Q4) Child has a pet back "home", has asked that her pet be
>sent to live with her here - ex refuses. What recourse have we
>once I file for change of jurisdiction/custody/etc?

Probably none, unless the other parent admits that the pet is a gift to the child. If the other parent testifies, and the court finds, that it's the parent's pet, then you're outta luck.

Buy the kid a new pet. Maybe that will encourage her to want to stay with you.

Whatever you decide, you need to act IMMEDIATELY to attempt to gain a temporary custody order. If you don't, you could find yourself in some very hot water with law enforcement authorities.

[good cause]

Thank you for your insight.  I know I need to get this on paper once and for all. My baby is now a teen with serious anger issues and her future is on the line. I have no desire to obstruct or deny her contact with her mom, and I have been supportive of her mother getting her own help for various issues.  I simply wish to protect my daughter from the instability back "home", in a legal manner, to keep her in a an environment which nurtures and encourages rather than causes despair and leads down a long, hard road.

Again, thank you. I will seek out counsel asap.

Best.