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Not allowing visitation

Started by WhatToDo, Nov 22, 2006, 07:14:02 AM

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WhatToDo

I have a 6 year old daughter. The mother has not allowed me visitation since April. Last weekend, I ran into BM and my daughter at the mall. I got to hold my daughter and talk to her a little. THe whole time I was holding my daughter, BM was badmouthing me. SAying how bad of a father I was, etc...

About 2 weeks ago, I had a contempt hearing set but BM never showed up because she was never officially served any papers. But BM DID know about the hearing. Anyway, the hearing was continued until the first week of December. She has been served papers for this hearing.

Even after knowing that I'm taking her to court for contempt, she still denies me any visitation. In fact she told me, when I saw her at the mall, that me taking her to court is just prolonging the time until I see my daughter again. I talked to my ex yesterda and asked to talk to my daughter but again she denied me that right as well.

I sent my ex a Letter of Intent to Exercise my Visitation. (I sent a copy to the clerk of courts) BM is supposed to notify me by Monday if I get to see my daughter or not. I'm pretty sure she will not show up on the dates I have given since she says I don't get any visitation anymore.

1. In court, can I bring up the fact that she was badmouthing me in front of my daughter? Or will this just be "he said, she said" and I shouldn't even waste my breath saying anything?

2. In your opinion, does BM look worse because even after finding out I was holding her in contempt, she STILL denies visitation?

WhatToDo

a few hours ago I met with my ex and signed a stipulation. But I signed as my own witness as well. I'm having second thoughts about signing this. BM told me that if I didn't sign it, she would tell my daughter that I never wanted to see her again. I caved...So I signed where it asks for my signature but also where it asks for the witness signature. SHe did the same for herself.

1. Is it legal for me to have signed as my own witness? (will it hold up in court)

2. Does me signing as my own witness give me a way out of this stipulation?

socrateaser

>1. In court, can I bring up the fact that she was badmouthing
>me in front of my daughter? Or will this just be "he said, she
>said" and I shouldn't even waste my breath saying anything?

you can bring it up, but it won't have much weight without some objective proof.

>
>2. In your opinion, does BM look worse because even after
>finding out I was holding her in contempt, she STILL denies
>visitation?

No. The court will not presume that a contempt exists until you prove it .

socrateaser

>1. Is it legal for me to have signed as my own witness? (will
>it hold up in court)

Proof of a signature can be made by any person reasonably familiar with your signature, even via a sample. So, the court could look at your signature on some other document and then determine that you signed.

There is no requirement that a stipulation be witnessed, so I don't know why your document had a place for a witness, unless there is some local court rule.

>
>2. Does me signing as my own witness give me a way out of this
>stipulation?

None that I can see.

Comment.

Your signing this stip under threat is what's known as undue influence, which is sufficient to void a contract. So if you testify to the reason why you signed, the court might refuse to order the stipulation.

Or, the court may just say you're trying to get out an agreement and enforce the stip.

Frankly, by signing the document you are showing some serious self destructive behavior. You should have smiled given your child a kiss, told her you love her and then told your ex that you'd see her in court.

But, instead you caved in. You need to get a spine and not permit your ex to control you.

WhatToDo

>Frankly, by signing the document you are showing some serious self >destructive behavior. You should have smiled given your child a kiss, >told her you love her and then told your ex that you'd see her in court.

>But, instead you caved in. You need to get a spine and not permit your >ex to control you.


For one, my child was not with my ex at the time all this happened. And my ex was standing there telling me that I was wasting my time taking her to court because nothing was going to change anyway. She said she had custody and what she says goes.  So far, she's right. I take her to court and the court gives orders and she doesn't follow them. She never gets in trouble.

Since I haven't seen my daughter since April, I figured at least by signing this stipulation, I might get to see my daughter once a week for therapy like the stipulation says. At this point I would do anything to see my daughter and court hasn't helped one bit.

Until a judge throws my ex in jail, nothing will change. BM has told me many times that she doesn't have to follow any court order and since no one has MADE her yet, it seems she's right. She gets away with whatever she wants.

Just wanted to tell you why I signed this stipulation...

socrateaser

>Until a judge throws my ex in jail, nothing will change. BM
>has told me many times that she doesn't have to follow any
>court order and since no one has MADE her yet, it seems she's
>right. She gets away with whatever she wants.
>
>Just wanted to tell you why I signed this stipulation...

I know why you signed. I've been doing this a long time. I agree that sometimes you have to pick your battles and sometimes you will get a raw deal from the court.

Nevertheless, if you don't fight for your rights, you will lose them to someone else who will fight. That's the way of the world since the beginning of time.

Bottom line is that you signed something that you admit not wanting to sign. You need to discover within yourself why you would do that. When you figure it out, you will be in a better position to defend your rights in the future.