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S.P.A.R.C. |
| Separated Parenting Access & Resource Center
"Keeping Families Connected"
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Your Behavior
It's important for your behavior to be impeccable, or to at least look that way. For example, there's nothing
illegal about an adult going to a "strip club" where there are nude dancers or strippers. However, if this
is brought up in court as a behavior of yours, it may be held against you even though it's legal. This may
be especially true in child-custody disputes. The same with going to bars, casinos, etc. It's not what you
actually do that counts, its what they think you do.
It's not my place to argue whether strip bars, casinos, etc. are good or bad. The point is that many judges,
social workers, magistrates, etc. consider them to be "bad" or "immoral" in some way, and in
their mind anyone that goes to "places like that" may be looked down on as "unfit" or
"morally deficient". I should mention that these are just a few examples of the kinds of things
that may offend or negatively influence judges or other people who may be involved in your divorce
proceedings.
You and I know that judges are supposed to be impartial and consider only the facts in a case, but if you
actually believe that, you're in for a rude awakening. If you think that judges don't allow their personal feelings
or morals to influence their decisions, you're wrong. The same goes for social workers, parenting evaluators,
psychologists, mediators, etc. All these people have (or may have) a say in what happens with your court case.
You don't want to do things that they may (in their mind) hold against you. It may be stupid or petty for them to do so,
but I assure you it wouldn't be the first time it has happened.
The point is that you need to avoid even the appearance of impropriety. If you engage in activities that might
be considered questionable (even though they're legal!) think about how you might be portrayed in court in
connection with those things. For the time being, clean up your act.
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