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Hi...sorry I haven't responded sooner.

Yes, fathers day was horrible....something I'd rather forget.  I moved to fl for job relocation.  The plan was for me to come here and get established in about a month or so and they come soon after.  She lied and made me believe that all was ok......when it was really her plan to just take the children and leave for good.  I also think that she was afraid of me having the children because they both told her that they would rather come and stay with me in FL which probably scared her so she along with her families devious plan took the kids back to IOWA.

My attorney filed a petition or next friend I think and something else.  I don't know if she has been served yet.....it should have happened sometime this week.  This is such a SLOW process.  I haven't been able to talk to them since.  I keep a phone log and call almost every day.  Unfortunately theres not much I can do write now.  Do you know what happens if she does not respond to the petition?  Thank you for the Divorce Poison resource....will definitely check that out.

Wilson

Thank all of you for your support.....

It is VERY hard for me to sit around while this is going on.....I did a personality profile a while back and one thing it said was that I was  best described as:

CONSISTENTLY TAKING CARE OF OTHERS

I HATE being in a situation in which I can not help or protect....it is killing me. This will totally blow you guys away.

I get a call out of the blue from my 7 year old daugher Diandra this evening around 6 or so.  I am in shock and don't know quite what to expect after everything that has taken place today...so I just started to ask questions to see what's going on.  It seems that xxx DID force my son to say that he didn't want to see me because my daughter said that when he seen her on the phone with me he ran up to the bathroom and locked the door and that xxxx was on the stairs talking to him.  I told Diandra to go tell Desomond that I wanted to talk to him and that I loved him and then xxxx yelled at her to get down stairs as if she was trying to tell him why he couldn't talk to me according to her.  I think my son has been used to say those things and he's upset.  She's manipulatiung him and it is WRONG.  When I told Diandra that he would never do this unless he was forced to....she said "I KNOW" and I asked again so she would say it louder.  I recorded the whole conversation...which was about 10 minutes long and it seems that xxxx mother and step father were NOT there...my daughter said  they were at a funeral but at the same time, it seemed as though my daughter was being coached when she wasn't answering my questions right away....they could've been listening on the other line or telling her what to say....I don't know.  I feel my son is being abused mentally and I'm very concerned. Do I have any options? or do I have to wait? I never got to talk to him.  This is wrong ....they didn't ask for this and they shouldn't be going through this. I know I could give them a better life and more love without all of the drama....the judge needs to talk to my kids and find out whats been going on....I know there is protocol and procedures....but this is wrong....not on fathers day....why on fathers day?

So they are home right now and not answering the phone.  I just received a text message from her and this is what it said?

From: xxxx

Dad please do not call us we do not wish 2 speak with u.  It has been r decision.

CAN U BELIEVE THAT.  So now she is writing mean messages to make it seem as if the children are writing them.  What on earth could be going through her mind to make her do such a thing?  

THEN.............................

I get a call from her parents house......I figure they want to argue or something and it's my sons voice whom I haven't heard in almost a month and SHE FORCED HIM TO SAY

"DAD WE DON'T WANT YOU TO CALL US ANYMORE"  and he hung up but you could tell in his voice that he wasn't saying that willingly.  This should be illegal.  How dare she do something so cruel on fathers day.  

Yes, I did tape the phone message.  Luckily my phone has a record function on it.  I have exported to mp3 and it is on my usb disk drive.  I just couldn't believe that they would do something like that.  

I also called my attorney to let him know too.  Thanks for your message!

Well I tried to call and was immediately greeted with an answering machine message that stated that if it was me to not leave a message for the kids because it would not get relayed and to never call the number again.  WOW, I think my heart fell out of my chest at that point.  I did leave a message though...couldn't help it.  No it didn't help anything but at this point I'm sure it did no damage.

How can people be so cold is beyond me.  Not only would I never NOT allow my children to talk to their mother but if I was staying at home, I would not allow my parents to do such a thing either.  How disheartening :(

Isaiah,

Thank you for your message.  Yes, you are correct and I originally wanted to do that but because I was relocating to another state, my lawyer and I decided that this would be the next best thing.

See she knew the situation and did this on purpose and had it planned for a VERY long time....since before March.  She was even so cold hearted to tell the children that I was going to go down there to find us a home and that they would be moving down there later yet knowing that she had NO intentions of doing this.  They both wanted to come with me and she hated that.  We all believed her and got duped big time.

Yes, you are absolutely correct.  I turned in a call log to my lawyer last week. I constantly call only to be hung up on or to a busy signal or answering machine.  She has permanently turned off her cell phone, though she still has service.  I even purchased more minutes for her cell phone so she could never say that she didn't have air-time.

My lawyer said that she probably won't get served until NEXT week and then she has 30 day's to file a response.  I will be moving to Florida this next week and plan on flying back and forth for court dates until this is settled.

As many of you know, today is fathers day AND my birthday and it breaks my heart to the core that I cannot be with my children.  I have NEVER been without my babies on father's day in 11 years.  I feel so empty as if a large part of me is missing.  I wish no one this pain that I feel.  I pray that after they come home from church that they she will feel momentary empathy and let them call me. I keep reading the sweet fathers day letter that my son wrote to me a year ago.

To all fathers out there.  If you do get a chance to be with your children today, please let them know how much you love them and squeeze them tight because some of us do not have that opportunity.

Happy Fathers Day Everyone & Thanks for All Your Support, It's about all that I have at this point and it means the world to me!

Hi,

Thanks for your message.  Yes my children are out of state BUT she will have to come here because Missouri has jurisdiction.  I will just have to fly back and forth for court dates.

My lawyer is going to ask the judge for full custody.  Aim for the stars and hope to get the moon, right? She will get served next week sometime and have 30 day's to respond.  If she doesn't, she will be in default.  Not sure what that will mean but that's what my lawyer said.

I imagine that she will show up with an attorney bought and paid for by mommy with domestic violence claims or something but I'm not worried about that because the kids know the truth but I AM worried that they will be saying certain things to the children over and over again as if to train them as to what to say or think if certain questions are asked.

I want to get insurance for the children before we even go to court but as far as I know you cannot get reduced or state insurance without the children actually living in the state correct?  For 2 children and a 1000 deductible is over $400 per month.  Does anyone have any insurance sources for affordable coverage for healthy kids?  Or could I get state insurance in her state without living there?

Thanks everybody for your support.  I hate court and I didn't really want to do this because now she will just get more angry and I will probably not be able to see or talk to my children for months which will just break my heart but what am I supposed to do.  I'm hoping the fact that I responded so quickly and the fact that I will be flying back and forth between stl and florida will show the judge how much I care.....even though it might not change the outcome.  She will probably drag this out as long as mommy will continue to pay so that the children will have been with her for many many months making it harder for any judge to go against the status quo :(

Just wanted to say that I didn't agree with everything that was said in the previous link I posted but I guess both sides are trying to play hardball in this arena.  

I've been doing some research to see how difficult it is for fathers to get primary custody of their children.  My research thus far does note bode well for us.  Never the less, more information will at least educate us so that we understand the process and are somewhat prepared for the road ahead.  I found a nice website that has a lot of good information on it that I thought others would perhaps like to look at.

http://www.intellectualconservative.com/how-fathers-can-win-child-custody-a-book-in-progress/

I hope it helps.