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MB - When we called GA CPS they responded immediately.  We are not having an issue with them and they have still been in contact with us.  They just can't do anything else until they get the approval from TN.  It was the police office here that said they would have to close their case. 

This all happened on Sunday and we didn't realize we had to call TN CPS until Monday night, so that's when we did it.  DF called them again yesterday and found out that they did open a case, so he left a message with the caseworker.  He will call again later today if he still hasn't heard from them, but I think they are supposed to respond within 48 hours no matter what.  I guess maybe they don't see it as a high priority since she's not supposed to go back until Sunday.

The TN caseworker is the same one that dealt with the false allegations last time (I'm really sorry if I keep repeating myself - I've got a lot on my mind, as you can imagine!).  I asked DF how the guy treated him last time and he said he felt the guy was unbiased and professional.  So that makes me feel better.  If he was unbiased last time then he should be this time as well.

DF talked to the GA CPS doctor here and she is faxing him the letter saying dd needs to stay here in the jurisdiction of GA.  If he gets it in time then he will go to the courthouse today, otherwise he will go first thing in the morning.

Yes, when we called CPS in GA they were closed so they just sent two officers over and we filed a report with them. So there is a police report here, but the detective in charge of it is the one who told us they would have to close the case soon since they don't have jurisdiction. We are trying desperately to file one in TN but the guy we have to file it with won't call us back (apparently only one cop in their town knows how to file a police report - WTF).

MB - so dad got held in contempt for holding the child? Did he not file a protective order or anything? The CPS doctor said that her letter would be enough for us to hold dd here, but I don't really believe her. Although we do have a clause in the custody order that says both parents "must follow all doctor's orders" so if the doctor orders dd to stay here, would we be in contempt? On one hand, we're violating the visitation agreement, but on the other hand, we're following the doctor's orders like the CO says we have to.

BM withheld dd from us last time before she got the TPO and our lawyer told us that even though she violated the court order and was in contempt, she probably wouldn't actually be held in contempt since she thought dd was being abused. So it would probably depend on the judge if we would actually be found in contempt. I have no idea what DF will do if we can't get a TPO.

You people have been so helpful. Thank you so much. DF and I are really stressed over this and it's hard when we have to keep a straight face on for dd's sake.

Ocean - that sounds exactly like what a TPO is here. A restraining order is different though.

Oh and no, she does not have a GAL. She had one before after the first false allegations but the one we got was a piece of crap. We had to pay her $3000 to do absolutely nothing. She sided with mom before she even spoke with mom (she tried to get ahold of mom for three months and couldn't) and even told DF that most courts think that girls should go to moms and boys should go to dads (which was obviously her way of thinking). She said that even though DF was an awesome father she still though dd should go to BM.

Well fortunately the custody court order is through our county. DF is planning on going to the courthouse tomorrow as soon as he gets the letter from the doctor.

The CPS guy still hasn't called DF back either - NO ONE is returning our calls. We're getting worried. It's the same guy that investigated the first case. Since it's a small town, we're also worried about them taking BM's family's side just for the fact that the people working on the case may know them personally.

Do we need a lawyer to file an ex parte motion? I've tried to find information about it but the only thing I can find is the temporary protection order. Is that the same thing?

MB - Unfortunately, we are not near a state line. We are only able to keep 50/50 because dd is not yet in school. We have to go to mediation by May of next year to figure out where she will go to preschool next fall.

When BM filed abuse allegations against DF in May, GA CPS said it was not their jurisdiction and wouldn't even open a case. TN CPS opened a case and interviewed BM. DF didn't know about any of it and drove there to try to get dd and that's when he found out about it. So TN CPS interviewed him while he was there. They closed the case when the std tests came back negative but their final report did say there were jurisdictional issues which makes us believe that it really should have been GA CPS that should have taken care of it. Now the GA police did open an investigation but closed it when TN CPS closed theirs.

Now in the current situation, GA police and GA CPS are saying it is out of their jurisdiction. GA CPS did say that they would do all of the work for TN, but they have to get permission from TN first. Fortunately, TN CPS did say that it was in their jurisdiction, but they haven't called DF back (although they should call by the end of the day according to their protocal). DF has been trying to file a police report in TN over the phone but they kept giving him different numbers to call. Now they are telling him he has to speak to a specific police officer (it's a small town) and he can't get ahold of the guy. He keeps leaving messages but the guy hasn't called him back. If he doesn't call back by Thursday then DF is going to drive up there on Friday and file the report in person.

Kitty - thank you.  That's good to know and I hope you are right (we are in GA by the way).  DF is going to the courthouse on Thursday to file the TPO.  The doctor is off today so he can't get the letter from her until tomorrow.   If he gets in touch with the sheriff from her state then he may do it tomorrow afternoon, but right now he is thinking he'll probably take Thurs and Fri off and drive to her state to file the police report since so far they haven't let him do it over the phone. 

My DF (dear fiance) has joint legal and physical custody, 50/50 time split, with neither parent designated as primary.  He has had week on, week off schedule since dd was 10 Mos old (she will be 3 in August). 

In May of this year, he filed contempt against BM (birth mom) for denying visitations and for not consulting with him on medical decisions for dd.  A week after she was served the papers, he found out she was alleging that he sexually assaulted dd.  She had been sick with diarheaa and broke out really bad and BM was claiming it was an std.  Of course the std tests came back negative and DF was cleared of all allegations.

Now on to this year.  Things have gone relatively smoothly except we just had to file contempt charges against BM for not giving DF half of her tax refund that she received for dd.  When we picked up dd this Sunday, on the way home she was saying "Girls do it easy, boys do it hard".  We asked her what she was talking about and she pointed to her genitals.  We asked her who told her that and she said her momma.  DF pulled over to get gas and I proceeded to ask dd a couple more general questions (Who touches you down there - Daddy and Mommy, etc.)  I asked her if anyone had hurt her down there and she said yes, her papaw had (BM's grandfather, who they live with).  I asked her to show me how he hurt her and she took her pointer finger and said "This finger right here" and started rubbing her genitals up and down and said "That's not very nice".  I asked her if she told her mommy and she said yes and that momma said Papaw don't do that.

When we got home an hour and a half later, DF asked her similar questions and she told him the exact same thing and demonstrated it to him as well.  So we called CPS and the sent officers out and told us to take her to the hospital to get checked out.  There weren't any physical signs of abuse but the doctors said that doesn't mean it didn't happen.

So now we're having trouble because we live in a different state then BM.  Her state is the one with jurisdiction but they are not being very cooperative.  No one will call us back.  We're waiting to hear back from both CPS and the sheriff's office.  Our state wants to had dd evaluated by a forensic pyschiatrist, but they can't do anything until they get permission from her state since the abuse happened there.

We are supposed to take dd back on Sunday and we're worried that things won't be taken care of by then.  CPS here doesn't want dd to go back with BM because they are worried BM will try to convince her that what happened (if it did happen) didn't happen.  The doctor is going to write us a letter saying she thinks dd should stay here with us until the investigation is complete.  We can probably get a temporary protective order against the grandfather with that letter, but what about BM?  Is that letter enough to allow us to keep her or is there something else we need to do?  I don't think we'll be able to get a TPO against BM since she hasn't actually abused her.  But we don't trust her to keep dd away from the grandfather, especially since they live together.  She does have one other relative she could stay with (her mother), but that housing situation isn't any better since her mother has a history of drug abuse and always has random guys coming in and out of her house.

Does anyone have some advice for us?