SPARC Forums

A man I know has a child with a woman to whom he is not married. DNA proved the child to be his. She is the primary custodian and in NY State, he does not have any custody without her permission (which she will not grant), so he only has visitation rights.

If she marries someone else, will that new man then become a primary custodian of the child?

Please help.

Note: I'm not an attorney, so this isn't sound legal advice.

If the new husband wants to adopt the child, and the father is willing to give up his parental rights, it's possible for the new husband to become the legal father of the child.

But if the father does not chose to give up his parental rights, has fought for his parental rights, and regularly involves himself with the child; then no court will terminate his rights.  In such scenario, the new husband will become the stepfather, with no legal rights regarding the child (i.e., other than acting on behalf of the mother).

If the mother is largely preventing the father from spending quality time with the child, it will be necessary to get court orders for regular parenting time between dad/child.

A failure to act in such manner could be interpreted by a court (in the future) as disinterest in parenting the child.  Or, it may not be viewed that way, but that's what the mother's attorney would argue.