SPARC Forums

I share joint custody of my four year old dauther with my ex-wife. She holds custodial status however. She is remarried and lives in the same State(Missouri). She recently joined the navy and has been gone for two weeks now. Because of my work schedule and distance from my ex-wife's home, I only see my daughter for Saturday and most of Sunday. The rest of the week is spent with my ex-wife's husband(now that x is gone). My ex-wife will not be returning to Missouri due to Naval assignments not existing here. I have no family or support here and want to move to California for job opportunities that would allow me to take care of my daughter full time. I also want to change custodial status, and terminate child support. I only wish to obtain custodial status and not take any rights away from my ex-wife. I want to know what is possible and what I need to do, file, or send to get this underway.

I have been reading about motions to modify and the 60-day notice of relocation letter that needs to be sent.  I just want to make sure I'm doing everything I need to be doing.  

stay put and fight your battle to gain primary residential status.

HOWEVER, retired military here, and I'm not sure you will actually win that argument.

I know (when I was doing my research in another state) that there was a parent (mom) who also joined the Navy and the state gave custody to dad.  She appealed to the state's supreme court, and the original decision was reversed.

As for the rest of the details, can't remember that part...

Terminating child support is usually (like 99% of the time) never an option for either parent.  A judge just won't allow that to happen.

Since you are now dealing with a military parent, you need to understand that the Soldier's and Sailor's Act kicks in and that it will be difficult to get her to appear in court personally period.  Not impossible, but very difficult.

You might be able to get a judge to give you temporary primary residential placement until the mother returns or is able to relocate the family to be back together.  

You might also be able to get the judge to make her pay for all future transportation costs for you to have your time with your child.

Lastly, you need to petition for a long distance arrangment as an alternative to asking for primary residential placement.  

Do not move FIRST.

And if you do get primary residential placement, be careful of moving second....it gives her the opportunity to argue back "IF I can't move with my daughter, why should dad be allowed to move with my daughter?"