SPARC Forums

I have been divorced since 2006. We had an uncontested divorce and at the time I made a really stupid mistake and gave her full custody. I knew she would never stop me from seeing my children any time I wanted to so I didnt think anything of it at the time. She had been a good mother up until that time. Now almost 4 years later the situation is totally different. She will not get a job. She gave up her apartment and moved 3 or 4 times in the last 10 months from one weekly suite to another. At the time of the divorce I was making almost 80,000 a year and agreed to 210 a week in child support, 90 a week in alimony, and must keep insurance on my children. Now for the last 2 years I have made roughly half of that and have only been able to send 100 a week plus still keeping insurance on the children.

In 2007, she gave me my 6 year old daughter because she would cry every day about wanting to live with me. I had papers drawn up for custody and when the time came for her to sign them she came to Alabama and snatched my daughter from school and put a felony charge of custodial interference on me. She claimed I took her for a visit and refused to bring her back. I had proof of my ex enrolling my daughter into school for me being I had no custody papers yet. Yet I was still put on a years probation because when she said to bring my daughter back because she didnt want to give up any child support, I refused. My attorney at the time told me that I had went far enough that the court would allow her to stay with me. Well that wasnt true. Apparently, as soon as she said to bring her home and I refused, I broke the law.

Now my children are living in a weekly rental motel in one room with their mother, sister, my 9 year old daughter, and my 5 year old son. Childrens services have been called on her for drugs and neglect 3 or 4 times. The police were called on her 2 weeks ago when her other ex came to check on his daughter and found the mother passed out in the bed with a bottle of liquor. The 13 year old (his daughter) was watching my two children at the time. The police came and made her get up, thats all!  I cannot afford an attorney at this time and my children are being neglected.  What can I do?  Here is a small example:  I bought my son a Thomas the Train lunchbox for Kindergarten and he said "Daddy, I cant take this to mommas house. We dont have any lunch there, no bread, no sandwich, no lunchmeat. That brought tears to my eyes. She will not let me have the kids even though she is clearly unfit at the time to take proper care of them. All she wants to do is get a check each week from both fathers.

Will someone please help me with some advice on what I can do? My children do not deserve this. My daughter is still telling her mother she wants to be with me and this is really hurting her and my son. He is a mommas boy, so it is not the same as with my daughter.

Thanks in advance for any help.

The only thing you can do is file for custody.  You don't have to have a lawyer, although it is recommended.

What happened with the previous CPS calls?  Any outcome?

What is the official custody arrangement at this point?  Which state has jurisdiction?

It's time for you to get yourself a crash-course on your the custody and support laws of the state holding jurisdiction over the case and learn how to prepare petitions and to file motions on your own.  You can do this.