SPARC Forums

My agreement says "30 days during the children's summer break from school".  That's all.  No dates, times, etc.  (Working on fixing this, but courts are slooooooowww.)  We agreed on dates, and now the kids are with me for 30 days.

Here's the problem, I asked her this week if she wanted to take the kids to dinner (she lives 15 minutes away), and she said that she didn't have time.  Now she wants to take them another week that they're with me.  I offered this week because it fit into the schedule.  I don't want to give her another day.  She is now saying that I am going back on my agreement.  I don't see it that way.  We have court coming up shortly.  How do you think a judge will see it?  I have limited time with the kids as it is, I don't see why I should have to give some of it up.

Any side agreements you might make are irrelevant. The only thing that matters is what your signed custody / parenting document says.

If you're following the court orders to the letter, she's got no grounds to complain. If she brings it up, just pull out the agreement and ask her which part she thinks you've violated.

no you don't HAVE to give her the time.

But I do think you're facing a dilemma -- which means there is no good answer.

My order also says something like "and at other times as agreed by the parties".

But EX hardly ever (I can't say never, but you can count the times on your fingers he's agreed over the last 10 years) agrees.

When I said in court that there's a provision for additional time -- his attorney countered with "And if he doesn't agree, is he really going against the court order?"

The answer is nope.  Don't know what the judge thought of it.....

So it's a double edged sword IMHO