SPARC Forums

Main Forums => General Issues => Topic started by: gemini3 on Oct 17, 2007, 08:32:40 AM

Title: Child care...
Post by: gemini3 on Oct 17, 2007, 08:32:40 AM
My ex has started taking classes, and leaves the kids with a neighbor for child care.  She has not notified me of this, nor has she given me the name/and or contact information of the person who is caring for the children.  The kids told me about it.

Is she required to notify me of this?
Title: RE: Child care...
Post by: Tikki on Oct 17, 2007, 09:13:08 AM
depends on the CO -sometimes there's something called Right of First Refusal - usually there's a time frame - for example, if mom is going to be unavailable for X no. of hours, then Father gets ROFR.  IF that is incorporated in your CO, then yes, she should have given you first choice.

However, like in my Dh's case - there's nothing incorporated in the CO specifying this.

So, when my DH is out of town for business, I (stepmom) keep the kids during his rotation (which is 3 days).  If BM were to go out of town say on a trip or something, she doesn't have to notify DH if she is going to hire a babysitter.

In general, she has no one she can leave the kids with during an extended visit - and she can't afford a babysitter - so she calls DH or myself when she needs to have someone keep the kids.
HTH
Title: RE: Child care...
Post by: gemini3 on Oct 17, 2007, 11:48:39 AM
I don't have an issue with her using a babysitter for a few hours.  I just want to know who is watching my kids, and how to get a hold of that person if there is an emergency.
Title: RE: Child care...
Post by: Tikki on Oct 17, 2007, 11:50:08 AM
I doubt it..
Title: RE: Child care...
Post by: gemini3 on Oct 17, 2007, 11:52:11 AM
you doubt what?
Title: RE: Child care...
Post by: ocean on Oct 17, 2007, 04:12:16 PM
No, but out of courtesy she should tell you.  If it is during her parenting time then she does not have to unless she is asking you to pay for some of it. Then you can push the issue about who and if it is a certified sitter. If there is an emergency, you would call the ex not the babysitter anyway....
Title: RE: Child care...
Post by: Tikki on Oct 18, 2007, 06:52:58 AM
what ocean's saying - I doubt she has to tell you legally.  Morally? Yes.  Its just good co-parenting when parents do whats best for the kids interests,....and not in feeding of their own control issues.

I'd try to talk to her about it....let her know that as a courtesy you would morally want to do what's best for the kids and that's letting their other parent know who they are wtih and when....