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Divorced for almost 2 years. Divorce was MESSY and lasted for almost a year. Got fed up and signed papers (after three lawyers' involvement) just to get the jerk (ex) off my back. Gave him his boat, 401K, half the house, cars; you name it. All I cared about was the kids. Stupid move, but done now.
The decree stated the marital home went up for sale and until it was sold, my ex was to pay the mortgage payment (to the tune of $600/month) in lieu of child support.
Housing market stinks, house has been up for sale for two years; and nothing. I cannot get support. Ex does not have to contribute to medical costs, insurance, child care, etc.....
I go to school full time and work full time, barely paying utitlities. On food stamps and financial aid, can barely pay for kids.

I CAN'T GET HELP!!!!!  No one wants to rescind this order or help out. FOTC does not care, the judge doesn't care; no one does. My kids suffer with nothing. Ex refuses to help, all the while buying new cars, jet skis, boats, toys, etc.....

I can't even clothe my kids.

HOW can I get help with this? Can't afford a lawyer. What do I do? "At least I have a roof over my head", I've heard that one before.

For the record, the court ordered support amount prior to the divorce decree being filed was $899/month for basic support. No child care included. (note-much less than the $600/month house payment)

Anyone have any tips, suggestions? Anyone been through this? FOTC says they haven't seen anything this bad in about 15 years, but that is no solace to me.

I'm at my wits' end, and my kids need clothes and such.

Hitting my head against a brick wall here....

(I LOVE the response about the looney bird!!!) I have a crazy woman (DH's ex, SS's mother) who parks outside the house, calls upwards of 30x per day when SS is here. Hang-ups, always. I can't afford caller ID, but am working on getting the phone company to record the number of calls.
BM has a history of drug abuse, (conviction with court ordered rehab), alcoholism, and anger management issues. Yet still retains custody of the child because she is a good liar, and the BM. (bm reminds me of a bowel movement, and that description fits her)

Do your best to stay your course. That is the most important thing. People like this slip up. It always happens, although it seems as though it takes forever, doesn't it?

Guard your cell # with your life, too. PPO's are hard to get, so make sure you document everything. Record, record. Take pictures, date everything. You will eventually catch her in her own game.

You have my utmost empathy, first of all.

The only thing to do is carry on with your life as much as possible, presenting a stable homefront and as much structure as possible. It has more of an effect that you are aware of.

I have two of my own, 7 and 8, and a 7 yo SS. The ex is horrid. When the SS is with his mother, he's up until 2a.m., has no structure at all. Fast food every day, nc-17 movies and video games, etc. He is left in latchkey from the minute they open until the minute they close, and then dumped with babysitters. We are allowed NO contact with him unless it is specific scheduled parenting time. (standard fotc schedule used). He "gets the belt" on a regular basis, but DH's ex is an excellent actress. SS is not allowed to LOOK at or talk to his father if it isn't his parenting time. (we live in the same small town). The child is an emotional mess and speaks often of "the other side" of his head that is bad.
We continue to provide as much structure as possible when he's here. And when he's here he is great. Excellent, SMART kid. I can only hope it is enough to carry him through adolescence.

As far as the anger, I feel it every day with my own too. Bite it back, take a drive and scream. But don't let the kids see it. They likely already see so much. If there is abuse suspected, call CPS immediately. At the very least, an investigation will scare the crap out of the ex.

Every day I wonder why it has to be like this, and why adults can't just act like adults. (it's like beating my head against a brick wall!!!)