Hello all, your feedback will be greatly appreciated. I have joint custody of my 8 yr old daughter who resides with me, Monday thru Friday. I attended a court hearing for sole custody on 1/17/06, the mother give up her right to have an attorney to represent her, but I had mines. My question is, since the mother wave to have a council, can and should my attorney talk to the mother? she wants to find out what the mother wants in regards to our custody case. Thanks in advance
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#2
Custody Issues / RE: Custody modification
Jan 26, 2006, 08:44:18 AM
Does anyone have any advise for me? I know my post was a little long, but I wanted to explaim the situation to you first, so you can have an idea of what's going on. Any help will be greatly appreciated.
#3
Custody Issues / Custody modification
Jan 23, 2006, 10:28:38 AM
I'm a new member from NY and was informed that this is a great forum to get some advice/feedback. I'm currently in a joint custody situation with my daughters' mother and wants a modification of the joint custody agreement. Our daughter is eight years old going on nine. My daughter has been residing with me for the past six years, Monday thru Friday and would go to her mother Friday evening and return Sunday evening under the agreement.
Over that period of time, there have been many problems and concerns. One of those concern was communication, which wasn't there from the beginning. I took the mother to court in 2001 for that reason and lack of support and interest in our child, especially when it comes to school, summer camp, shows, birthdays, etc. I taught that would have been a wake up call for her, but the situation still remains the same.
The mother has not been working for the past two years and the situation has gotten worst. The lack of communication still remains a major problem between us, especially when it involves our child. For the past two months, she decided that she's going to file for public assistance to support herself, her two year old son, her childs' father and our daughter. To do so, she claims on her application that our daughter we have together is living with her and that she supports her. This is all false and falsifying documents. She was told that she needed to show proof that these kids live with here and that she supports them.
Two weeks within the month of November 2005, she took our daughter to another doctor, other than the one my daughter has already without my knowledge. I confronted her on this, but was told that she is trying to provide for her family and she needs to do whatever is neccessary to do so. The following week, she took our daughter to the lab to give blood, knowingly that the child already has all her blood work, shots, and her medical records are up to date.
This became another serious concern with the other concern I already have with our child being with her mother. The other concerns includes Pot smoking buy the mothers' boyfriend and his friends in the presence my daughter and her two year old son, my child sharing the same bed with her mother, brother, and the boyfriend.
I decided to file a petition in court since we don't share the same concerns and interest in our child and her children. The judge appointed a case worker from ACS to investigate the situations in both homes. On the day of my interview with the case worker in my home, I explain the entire situation and all the concerns I have concerning my child. My concerns basicallyl surrounds the best interest for our child and the welfare of her safety. My daughter had her one and one interview with the case worker as well, which my daughter was a little uncomfortable with, but was able to pull through.
We appeared in court on Jan. 17, 2006, in which I had an attorney and she didn't. My attorney received a copy of the report that the case worker submitted to the judge. The report includes information from both myself and our daughter also, her mother who was interviewed first.
The mother claimed to the case worker that I am trying to keep her daughter out of her life and whatever I do with her, I do not involve her. She also claims that I was abusing our child and that I've send our child over to her house with marks on her body. The boyfriend claimed that I have no respect to women and that whatever I say, that must go.
first of all, the boyfriend doesn't know anything about me and doesn't know the history of me and his woman either. He's just going on what she told him. For him to come out of his face and make any remarks towards me, I find that very disrespectful. Any and everything I do and have done with our child, I've inform and try to get her mother involve. It's up to her, wheather she wants to involve herself or not. "I can not force a mule to drink water, It will drink the water when it's ready." Once it's aware of where the water is before it's too late. I took the false accusation about me abusing my child very serious and there is no where in hell, I would ever abuse my child. The mother knows how sensitive I am with marks on our child skin/body. Why would she ever make a statement like that and if she felt I was abusing her child, why didn't she do something about that? Why didn't she file a report? WHY?
We finally got into the court room and infort the judge. My attorney states my case (concerns) and reason for modification, which was for sole custody. The judge then turned to the mother and ask her if she wish to be appointed an attorney and she give up that right to have an attorney. The mother states her case involving the pot smoking, which she denied all accusations against her. Then she brought up the abuse to the judge, informing the judge that in November 2005, her child came to her home with marks on her skin and that I was abusing her child. At that point, the judge got very upset asking the mother, "Did you file a report in court in November and December? Did you file a police report in December?" She replied no, so why are you reporting it now, the judge replied.
The judge was so upset, that she appointed a Law Guardian for our daughter and set up appointments for us to meet and for me to bring along our child. This meet must be done before our next court date in April.
Sorry for the lond details. Does anyone have any advise, concerns, or feedback for me before my next court date. This will help me a great lot. I've try to do everything the right way for my child, I've made countless sacrifices and make life better for my child and myself. What more must a parent, a father, has to do in order for the other parent to get involve in their childs' life and try to share the same interest the other parent has for their child. HELP HELP..Any advice would be helpful.
Thanks for listening
Over that period of time, there have been many problems and concerns. One of those concern was communication, which wasn't there from the beginning. I took the mother to court in 2001 for that reason and lack of support and interest in our child, especially when it comes to school, summer camp, shows, birthdays, etc. I taught that would have been a wake up call for her, but the situation still remains the same.
The mother has not been working for the past two years and the situation has gotten worst. The lack of communication still remains a major problem between us, especially when it involves our child. For the past two months, she decided that she's going to file for public assistance to support herself, her two year old son, her childs' father and our daughter. To do so, she claims on her application that our daughter we have together is living with her and that she supports her. This is all false and falsifying documents. She was told that she needed to show proof that these kids live with here and that she supports them.
Two weeks within the month of November 2005, she took our daughter to another doctor, other than the one my daughter has already without my knowledge. I confronted her on this, but was told that she is trying to provide for her family and she needs to do whatever is neccessary to do so. The following week, she took our daughter to the lab to give blood, knowingly that the child already has all her blood work, shots, and her medical records are up to date.
This became another serious concern with the other concern I already have with our child being with her mother. The other concerns includes Pot smoking buy the mothers' boyfriend and his friends in the presence my daughter and her two year old son, my child sharing the same bed with her mother, brother, and the boyfriend.
I decided to file a petition in court since we don't share the same concerns and interest in our child and her children. The judge appointed a case worker from ACS to investigate the situations in both homes. On the day of my interview with the case worker in my home, I explain the entire situation and all the concerns I have concerning my child. My concerns basicallyl surrounds the best interest for our child and the welfare of her safety. My daughter had her one and one interview with the case worker as well, which my daughter was a little uncomfortable with, but was able to pull through.
We appeared in court on Jan. 17, 2006, in which I had an attorney and she didn't. My attorney received a copy of the report that the case worker submitted to the judge. The report includes information from both myself and our daughter also, her mother who was interviewed first.
The mother claimed to the case worker that I am trying to keep her daughter out of her life and whatever I do with her, I do not involve her. She also claims that I was abusing our child and that I've send our child over to her house with marks on her body. The boyfriend claimed that I have no respect to women and that whatever I say, that must go.
first of all, the boyfriend doesn't know anything about me and doesn't know the history of me and his woman either. He's just going on what she told him. For him to come out of his face and make any remarks towards me, I find that very disrespectful. Any and everything I do and have done with our child, I've inform and try to get her mother involve. It's up to her, wheather she wants to involve herself or not. "I can not force a mule to drink water, It will drink the water when it's ready." Once it's aware of where the water is before it's too late. I took the false accusation about me abusing my child very serious and there is no where in hell, I would ever abuse my child. The mother knows how sensitive I am with marks on our child skin/body. Why would she ever make a statement like that and if she felt I was abusing her child, why didn't she do something about that? Why didn't she file a report? WHY?
We finally got into the court room and infort the judge. My attorney states my case (concerns) and reason for modification, which was for sole custody. The judge then turned to the mother and ask her if she wish to be appointed an attorney and she give up that right to have an attorney. The mother states her case involving the pot smoking, which she denied all accusations against her. Then she brought up the abuse to the judge, informing the judge that in November 2005, her child came to her home with marks on her skin and that I was abusing her child. At that point, the judge got very upset asking the mother, "Did you file a report in court in November and December? Did you file a police report in December?" She replied no, so why are you reporting it now, the judge replied.
The judge was so upset, that she appointed a Law Guardian for our daughter and set up appointments for us to meet and for me to bring along our child. This meet must be done before our next court date in April.
Sorry for the lond details. Does anyone have any advise, concerns, or feedback for me before my next court date. This will help me a great lot. I've try to do everything the right way for my child, I've made countless sacrifices and make life better for my child and myself. What more must a parent, a father, has to do in order for the other parent to get involve in their childs' life and try to share the same interest the other parent has for their child. HELP HELP..Any advice would be helpful.
Thanks for listening
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