Messages

From my own personal experience, helping my husband with his ex, I have learned ALOT. It doesn't hurt that I work for our attorney either ;)

Sometimes you have to go over everyones heads. Make waves. The squeeky wheel gets the lube etc.
When the child support office in our county failed to do their job, I went to the state child support enforcement office (by phone and email). In fact, I made it through to the top dog. I told her what was going on and what was not going on. The county office didn't like it when the heirarchy came calling.

If you are dealing with a bunch of schmucks in a county office, I strongly suggest you leave footy prints on their heads on your way to the top.

Being a woman, a step mom and wife to a "nice guy" I say, go in guns blarring, balls to the wall. Seriously.
Being nice isn't going to get you any more, and probably less. The ex will see it as a sign of weakness and take advantage.
You're getting divorced. The time for nice has passed. You don't need to draw blood, not right away, but don't play nice nice either. Just don't.
You, and your future wife (there will be another woman sooner or later) wil regret it.

DH and I are custodial to his kids. BM is a worthless piece of sh*t who has seldom called, visited, never given gifts, etc...

For the past year she and her *unt attorney have filed motion after motion to have her child support lowered under the pretense of wanting visitation.
She has gone from a high paying job to lower paying jobs over and over and immediately gone back to the higher paying job.

The last time she filed she had quit working all together. The commissioner (the hearing before actually seeing the judge) found her in contempt of non payment and being under employed. She hadn't paid her current support and she hadn't paid anything towards her $5000+ arrearage.

At the hearing before the judge, he did not find her in contempt and gave her enough of a reduction that it made up for all but $120 of the current support she hadn't paid since filing for a reduction the last time.

This is the same judge that told DH he NEVER bases a ruling on gender.
He damn well did.
Even if she had been due a reduction, anything she had over paid could have gone to reduce the $5000+ arrearage she owes.

Who can we contact? Where do we start?
Our attorney filed a motion to reconsider but who knows what will happen. I have my doubts about it changing.

DH is forced to drive half way to meet her for visitation now but that will end any time. She isn't interested in visitation. It's just a temporary farce. DH is forced to do that but she isn't even being required to pay support at this time.

HELLLLLP please