Messages

Soc,
Thanks for getting back so quickly.

As far as detrimental reliance goes, I suspect my definitions are likely not the exact same as the laws.  Does that mean they intentionally did something that made me have good reason to rely on them, to my detriment?

1.  Opposing counsel submitted a declaration they said was from the visitation monitor.  It stood in direct contradiction to all the monitor's weekly reports.  When I saw the signature page, I knew without question the signature was my ex's handwriting.  (they produced it just after the hearing started.)  I pointed it out to my atty and he said nothing.  (he was getting alot of litigation from this other attorney and quit 2 months later) I've tried getting ahold of the monitor twice but he doesn't return my calls.

2.  They submitted a declaration from my ex's sister that a great deal of weight was given to by the court.  I spoke to the sister last year and she said she was never deposed by opposing counsel.  Never even talked to him, in fact.  And that my ex threatened to throw her out of the house if she didn't sign the last page.  She agreed to sign a new declaration, but got cold feet.

3.   Opposing counsel was my atty of record before the IRS on the day he showed up for the hearing in family court, representing my ex.  Later, he sent to my former atty, a letter he said he'd sent to the IRS withdrawing as counsel.  The IRS didn't have that letter in the file and even asked me to provide in writing, a letter dismissing him from a second part of action with the IRS.  

     Is part of that conflict of interest?
     Is another part fraud?  (He never sent any letter to the IRS.  He DID produce one after the custody hearing, though.)


Isn't evidence of forgery a crime the D.A. would investigate?  They told me they usually only take things through referral from other law enforcement agencies, etc.  

I'd like to walk away from all this and just do the best I can to grab whatever time with my son that we can get.  But she's broken off all communication.  She's halted one of our (arranged out of court) visits and all of his and my phone calls.  So I don't want these parts to get worse.  

What you do here is a wonderful thing.  Thank you.  If and when i can, i will donate to the site to keep it going.

Hi Socrateaser,
   I've been doing some work since we last spoke.  Here's what I have so far.

   1.  Possible criminal exposure
   2.  Exposure to State Bar investigation/disciplinary action
   3.  Grounds for Contempt or Non-Compliance filing in Family Court

Follows are some details;

   1. Civil Court? - Criminal charges
       a.  I believe I have evidence to prove 3 separate counts of Fraud, 2
            counts of conspiracy, 1 count of extortion/coercion and 1 count of
            malice

   2.  State Bar - RPC Violations
        a.  Conflict of Interest
        b.  Contacting Opposing Party
        c.  Inducing to Violate
        d.  Advising to Violate

   3.  Family Court
        1.  Contempt might be proven upon conviction in Civil Court?  Big IF.
        2.  Non-compliance (school and therapist evidence is beginning to            
             pile up)


1.  I talked to the D.A.  They said "Call the Bar."

2.  I talked to the Police, they said go to Family Law and put it all in front
     of the judge that heard the initial case

3.  I talked to the Bar and they said "File a complaint, list only the RCP
     violations.  We don't do the fraud stuff."

4.  I haven't called CPS.  My experience is they're not very skilled.  It
     would escalate the mother no end.

5.  I haven't tried to find counsel that would do the fraud et al on
     contingency.  Is that even how it's done?

6.  1, non-ordered weekly visit (for homework) has been withdrawn, all
     ordered telephone calls (3 per week) have ceased, my calls are not
     returned, nor are my emails responded to.  She is forcing all
     communication to go through our son.  Which I try to keep to a
     minimun to spare him.


My question is what do you think I should do?  Should I start with Family, then to the Bar and hope either of them refer to the D.A.?

I don't have the money for strong legal counsel and I can't survive another bout of malicious prosecution.  

My son's grades have gone from A- to F in the last 4 months under his mother's management and he's shutting down and getting in trouble.  
 

Thanks again Soc.  I edited my post in the "I lost so what now?." thread.  My apologies.

Do you know what the statute of limitations is on forgery in California?

Understood.

Do you know the Statute of Limitations on Forgery in California?  Going to have to start classes if this keeps up.

Thanks

DecentDad,

So much of what you wrote describes what I went through and still experience.

Soc is right about "calm down."  At least around your ex and especially around your daughter.  It's been six years since my first court appearance.  The only thing I've found that matters at all is that my son knows without question that he can get emotional support from dad.  

I'm working on having to take my ex back to court.  Her attorney was pretty nasty too.  But I have to weigh all that against what will be worse for my son.  Continued bad parenting by his custodial mother or the terror of another court conflict.  

It's a long-term effort.  Take Soc's advice the best you can.  Record as much as you can.  Be the light in your child's life, no matter what and keep going.

Have you ever heard of BPDCentral?  If your ex seems over the edge, you may find some support and insight there too.  

You didn't really lose today.  I know how much it hurts to have to accept less time with your child.  But if you keep going, you will end up with more time again.  I think that when you're dealing with a difficult ex, it's inevitable. Make your time with your child her best, happiest time.  Protect her from the adult stuff and you'll see her bloom right in front of you.

Good luck

Ill

Thanks Soc.  I"ve started with the State Bar's Code of Conduct.  Two  questions for you, though.

1.  What is the statute of limitations on attorney misconduct?  

2.  This guy was my attorney of record (and friend of the family) before the I.R.S. for the purpose of negotiating an Offer in Compromise on old debt.  Concurrently, I filed an OSC to restore visitation under an Ex Parte filing.  He showed up with ex.  Represented her all the way through.  Even sent my new attorney a post-dated letter withdrawing as counsel on the I.R.S. thing two months later.  The question;

From what you can see, does that constitute conflict of interest?  We had a personal relationship prior to all this happening.  It shocks me that someone constrained as attorneys are, can behave this way with impunity.

Hey Soc,
     Hope your vacation was enjoyable.  If you're willing and able to try again, mind if I start with a different tack?
     Simply put, opposing counsel was really at the bottom of a lot of troubles.  Are there ways to be such a bad taste in their mouths that they are willing to recuse themselves?
     Any input would be helpful.  You can even reach me privately at [email protected].
     Best wishes

Dear Socrateaser,
   Were that I were a child of five.  But since I'm not, I apologize.  To all the others who took the time to post, my apologies to you as well and thank you for taking the time to put your thoughts down on silicone.

   Soc, there are indeed things in your replies to my posts that are very informative.  I've been so isolated for so long, I forget how to communicate.  So thank you for your tolerance.  Plus, I'm just mad they dropped a house on my sister.

    I think my first misstep was to dive in before I've had a chance to really review this entire board.  I wish I'd known it was here a long time ago.  

    I stand corrected and hope you all find a very little amount of alienation by newcomers to be slightly amusing.

    Enjoy your vacation and hopefully we can start off on different and better footing.

Look,
   I've taken a beating from this nutjob for a very long time and I've watched a wonderful little boy struggle to grow up under this constant onslaught.  You've presented yourself as a knowledgeable and caring person and without doubt, I do appreciate your time and effort.  But if you're so tired of watching this parade of misery that you can't contain your sarcasm, I suggest you get your a** off this board.

   The judge apparently thought it was a good idea because of the flood of bulls*** he got from her and her moron attorney.  They manufactured evidence, submitted statements from 4 other nutjobs and astoundingly enough, managed to create enough prejudice during the initial stages of the proceedings that crawling out from under it cost me everything I have.

   For the last 7 years, I have watched her isolate this boy as well as her new husband, berate them to the point where they struggle to remember their own names and get away with chronic disregard for the very specific details of this order.

Her allegations devastated me emotionally, financially and socially.  My reputation is ruined in this town and so is my health.  I do not miss any opportunity to support this child in any way and we need help putting salt on this bird's tail.  

Thanks for your help Socco.  And may I add your moniker's got a bit more than just a little hubris attached.

Thanks again Socrateaser.

The Order is for Joint Legal Custody.  Primary residence with Mother.  Additionally, Mother holds Unilateral Decision making authority regarding school and health.

I think I understand what you're referring to about something that can be useful as evidence.  I'll try to look around and learn how to develop evidence that can actually be used.  Any suggestions?

If her mental health is worsening, is there a way to track or record that in a way that the courts can attribute some weight to?