Messages

Dear Soc,

I'm desparate for advice. I filed a modification of custody in April of 06, contempt on NCP for not paying child support etc.  Judge found contempt in child support and NCP only made one payment which was the minimum amount due by the next hearing held 2 months ago.  NCP has not paid another cent and has been pro se up until our last hearing a week ago.  Met in front of a master and NCP suddenly appeared with new representation for modification of custody.  New representation received extension of discovery in order for the case to be reviewed. I'm sick over it!  NCP has history and i have documentation of teaching our child how to hurt and harm others, hygiene, dietary and clothing needs are not being met while in the care of the NCP.  Minor child states that NCP shows no availability to spend time wih the child and NCP has no involvement with educationa and social environment.  but now that an extension has been given, NCP is on "good behavior" as if he has been caring for our child. ie, taking our child to social activities.  This case has been going on for 2 yrs.  i have multiple journals that NCP is aware of since we've been in and out of court, emails from social activity leaders stating no response from NCP.  The list goes on. Here are a couple of questions as i know i will have many more:  

1.  How far back does a Judge consider substantial change in circumstance now that NCP is abiding the original custody order?

2.  Will a Judge consider in my favor (Primary physical custody) NCP's lack of paying  child support  until NCP saught new representation a substantial change?

3.  What hard facts do i now need to add for the pre trial conference?  

Thanks for your help.
MWH

Thank you!  If you don't mind, couple more questions:

1.  If i am entitled to a copy of the response, would it go to me or my attorney?

2.  If the NCP doesn't know to send a response to my attorney, will it delay the hearing?

3.  If the NCP has an attorney, will they still say nothing in response to the complaint?  

4.  Would the NCP's attorney say nothing as well to my attorney prior to the hearing?  

Sorry for so many questions, but i seem to get more response from you Soc and i'm feeling anxious already.  

Thanks again.

Dear Soc,

Just an update and a quick question.  Things have been extremely quiet which i'm thankful for.  My questions are:

1. Doesn't the NCP have to respond to the papers served for the upcoming show cause hearing?  

2. How do i know if NCP has done anything?

3.  Would my attorney receive an answer to the complaint?

4.  Would the Clerk's office give me a copy of the response if there was one?

Any information is appreciated.

MWH

Thank you as you have been most helpful.

Thanks Soc!

Just an update with another question/

I placed another call to my Attorney on Monday and was told the papers have been served and hearing is set one month away.  

NCP is in contempt of the whole custody order, which includes 2 yrs of  CS arrears   Committed perjury as well and transcripts have been received from hearing last year.  

My question:

1..Is  this still a contempt of first refusal?  

2. Do you know what happens when perjury is committed?

Thanks for your help.

MWH


 

Dear Soc,

I have Primary Physical residence of our child with tie breaking decision authorityand Joint Legal custody as stated in our papers.    We all reside in the state of Maryland.  Since September of 2005, the date of the custody trial,  NCP has been in violation.  My attorney had said to give it 3 mos to see if things will settle and change.  Its been nearly a year now and with much  contact as i have had to get things moving, my attorney finally got papers filed in March.

 Since then, my attorney has received 3 show cause oders signed by the Judge to have my ex served.  My attorney had advised me each time that a PP he knew of would have my ex served in a timely manner. I had asked that he include a Sheriff in the papers to serve as well this last time and he had done so but he reassured me that all will be taken care of with his PP.    Maryland court does not give much time for serving in such cases and as you see, I've had to sign a reissue 3 times in the course of 4 mos to have my case heard.   Many calls by me to the courts and to my attorney today as I've just learned  this last order  will not be heard due to ex not being served.  My attorney is not responding to me at the moment.

My questions are:

1.  How many times will a Judge approve a re issue to show cause?

2.  Will the Judge frown upon me and reflect his decisions as to why i have waited so long to get contempt and show cause heard when we proceed?

3.   My attorney's words mean nothing to me anymore but i need his expertise in the courtroom so how do i handle this matter with my attorney?

4.  Can you define Tie breaking descion authority as my ex refuses to adhere to any desions i make?  

5.  Is the ex in contempt for refusing my desions when theres discussion of the  best interest of our child?

Any advice or help you give is appreciated.  Thank you for your time.

Sad and very Frustrated,
Mommy with heart

 

Thanks for writing.  Just a couple things.  Our court order has our child's activities superceeding visitation.  The NCP refuses even with my request and final decisions to transport our child.  The NCP agreed to our child's participation with all she is involved in but does not and has not followed through.   There are many issues not just our child's missing her acitvities that show a change of circumstances.  I thank everyone for writing as our hearing is less than a week away.      

Thank you for your positive response.   I am very much focused on my daughter's well being and thats it.  Being angry with my ex is time i don't wish to spend.  The non payment of child support is not why i am seeking modified custody.  I seek it due to lack of care of our daughter, unable to provide transportation unless ex is with mother and or her car etc.  Ex uses mom's bank account to desposit monies, (this is known from our hearing).  My ex has been living with his mom for over 3 years, unsure if there is employment, and has no vehicle.  

 My means of communication with my ex is due to lack of responding to my messages left regarding activities for our daughter.  Ex also assaulted me in front of our child a few years ago so it is court ordered that we meet in a public place for exchanges.  Due to ex's license being suspended, i just learned it was reinstated since the last court order did not request child support  to be made throough DR.  Therefore, they closed the first case and reinstated the license. Our legal system appauls me.   I too, have battled this for 4 yrs and  I will continue to remain focused as i am looking at the best interest of my child.  Thank you again for your response.

Thank you for responding.  NCP is required by court order to transport to and from activites
if our daughter is visiting NCP.  NCP wrote me one letter stating he would not participate with this since it interferes with his visitation.  Certified mail is being used to correspond with NCP due to NCP not willing to respond to phone communication.  there is documentation of NCP's license being suspended.  NCP refuses all that is in the court order.  NCP also committed purgy in custody hearing 9 months ago.  The court order also states that primary custodian has tie breaking decision making in all matters.    

I am going to court soon as my ex is in contempt of our custody order.  The NCP has failed to comply with my requests sent certifed mail for our daughter to attend scheduled activites and also is a year behind in no child support.  At this time i am the  Primary Custodian with the final say in our daughter's upbringing.  Obviously this is being ignored by the NCP.
I have filed for modification of custody due the non compliance of the order and lack of care of our daughter.  Also, the NCP has and is driving with a suspended license with our daughter.  I'm looking to see if anyone feels that i have a chance to gain full physical and legal custody of my child.  Just need to hear some positive feedback.