Messages

Thanks for your insight Kent. Too much information can never be enough on this topic, as I have so far found many people with many different views and circumstances - many of them beneficial to a newby like myself.

Unfortunately, my sister is also currently going through an ugly separation and apart from her living 2hrs from town, it would not be the happiest of households to be in at the moment.

It would be sad to burden my parents (yet again) by having to move into their house indefinately. Not sure how I would go either after being on my own for the past 14 years.

But beleive me, I will do everything in my power to keep the property, and your suggestion may be the only option left for me.

The rent would not even cover half of the mortgage payments, but as you say it would certainly be better than losing it, if that course was financially workable.

I am unsure of your LLC terminology, but I presume you mean to offset the rental income against the propery maintenance expenses, producing a negative return?

And your second option was discussed, but proven inadequate as it could still be traced and seen as me reducing my CS.

Thanks again, I will let you know how I go.

Sorry to give false hopes to anyone - including myself, but according to my accountant, my plan would cause more dramas than it's worth.

I was considering resigning, then opening my own business and contracting to the company I work for. That way I could pay myself minimum wage and the business could contribute to my mortgage and bills etc. It sounded too good to be true, and unfortunately it was.

Oh well, back to the grind stone to work for minus $100 per month. It looks like I will finally have to sell the house that I have worked for 9 years to keep. It was my only concrete future for my daughter, and now I must sell it - with very little chance of ever being able to buy another.

What I don't understand is how it is "best for my daughter" that I cannot afford to put food on the table, or retain the one asset I have for her future, whilst BM continues to earn more than me? Typical political logic I suppose.

Thank Christ I have understanding parents and sister, ready to house and feed me if need be, for which I am extremely thankful. It seems much easier to swallow my pride nowadays, beacuse there is so little left.

Hi King Sam. Im glad to hear that your being the good brother. If only we could all have the same help, the world would be a slightly better place.

I live in Oz, and I'm pretty sure the systems work the same over here, so here's what I know.

One of my firends had the exact same thing happen to him just recently, and there are courses of action to prevent/reduce the likeleyhood of it happening.

Firstly, your brother needs to seek legal assistance - over here we have a free service called legal aid, but only if you are financially strapped.

He can apply for an "Injuction" (with or without legal help) preventing his wife from leaving the state. She can still leave, but it will mean she has to return for the court hearings, and if she still choses to leave, it will be up to her to pay for at least 2 return flights per year for the child to maintain some form of contact - and more if your family wants additional contact also.

This is all I know on the topic, but hopefully it's a start for you.

Keep us posted on the outcome.

Best wishes.

thanks genie, i am aware of that scenario. As for SM - your're right and Im the novice. I thought it meant separated mum. Stay tuned, I'm off to see my accountant.

Thank God I found this place tonight, because lately I have been contemplating some very unpleasant actions, none of which would benefit anyone, and all with thanks to the emotional and financial trauma SM has put me through.

After shedding a few quiet tears over other stories, I feel in good company for the first time in 5 months, seeing the other strong people in similar situations, and some worse.

It has given me a clear head to assess my own situation, dismissing my thoughts of murder/suicide and finally focusing on a plan which will hopefully lead me and my daughter to a happier life, and possibly benefit you readers somewhat.

Im not quite ready to spill my guts just yet, but I firstly wanted to congratulate all the non-custodial parents for still holding hope... no matter how thin it may seem. I admire your strength and morals.

Just as a teaser, I am quitting my 55k p/a job this week whilst maintinaing my child support, mortgage payments, bills and saving for a lawyer to go for full custody, without a cent in the bank. How you might say? I can't tell you right now, but once I have established it's viability and am sure SM cannot interfere, I will let you all know.

My best wishes go out to you all and please stay strong everyone!

I will be back... I promise. Hugs for all that need them....

A desperate aussie with a glimmer of hope.