in 2002 just before i was going to ask my partner to marry me, she told me she was pregnant. This and our financial situation has caused us to postpone our wedding, so that we are not currently married. My daughter is now almost 4 and my son 10 (his bio dad left the country when he found out, never to return). We have been living as a family for 5 years now, planning to wed when we can afford it. We have had a stressful year, I am a graduating medical student who is graduating a year late after I had matched in an emergency medicine residency last year, i was unable to graduate and so have had to rematch this year, we have been under considerable strain. My "wife" has been applying to masters programs in history in the 4 cities that I interviewed in. Our hope was that wherever i matched, she would get into a program there or would otherwise reapp next year. This was our plan until 3 weeks ago. Then we had a fight and she said it was over. I subsequently found out that she was accepted to tufts with a scholarship. Her desire to pursue this goal that she feels she has had to put off for my medical training is the primary motivator in her wanting to split up. I am most likely to end up in pittsburg or york, penn. She wants to take my daughter and son (whom i have not yet legally adopted, and doubt she would allow that now) to boston. She does not seem prepared to reconcile. I know there are laws that prevent a spouse from taking a child out of state, but i do not know how our circumstance would be handled. an EM residency is NOT like on tv and i would have plenty of time to be in their lives, and even be their primary care giver, but would not have time to drive the 6-10 hours one way and i would rarely see them in that case. I have gone from planning to have a happy family in penn where i matched, to wondering how many times i will see my kids in the next 3 years...what rights do i have? i will have an income and live in an affordable city, she will have financial aid and live in boston. thank you for helping me,
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