Messages

>>Thanks for the answer:
>>I have both 50% physical and legal custody.  Juristiction is
>>in my home city.  I like this forum.  There is alot of good
>>info here.  thanks again
>>
>>Shawn
>
>That's a very odd arrangement - that you have 50% physical
>custody but live in different cities - especially for a child
>so young. Ignoring what the agreement says, how many nights a
>year is the child with you?
>
>That increases your chances, but you STILL have to convince
>the court that it's in the child's best interest to change
>custody. The plus is that once the kid starts school, it will
>have to switch to one parent primary, anyway. The minus is
>that it will have to switch to one parent primary - and if she
>has more nights than you, it works in her favor.

I understand that even if both parties have 50 legal and physical sometimes the court designates one parent as the primary residence.  Hopefully they will either not do this or give me the title of primary residence.  If they givew it to her does that mean she is more favorable when it comes to deciding full custody?

Thanks for the answer:
I have both 50% physical and legal custody.  Juristiction is in my home city.  I like this forum.  There is alot of good info here.  thanks again

Shawn

More details:

I live in CA and as far as I understand her income should be based on what her earning potential is and being that she still has a job they should base it off of that income which was equal to mine.
>

Will I have to pay child support?
Here are the facts:

We share custody. After we found out she was pregnant she went on disability and said the pregnancy inflamed an old back injury. We never agreed that she would not return to work and she never quit. I repeat, she still has a job but does not go to it because they won't fire her and she won't quit. She is suing them for the back injury that happened prior to marriage. She is not disabled.
The marriage fell apart among other reasons was money. Soon her state disability check ran out and I was left with the burden of paying for everything. After I filed for divorce she filed a TRO and got me kicked out of the house and the court ordered I pay for all the bills. I ended up paying over $7,000 in lieu of child support. The house sold and she moved to another city (and did not provide a correct address) and I pad her total of $800 in child support. She stopped taking my money and told me she would not accept money.


I have no problem paying I just don't want to be screwed for the next 16 years.

She stopped taking my money and told me she would not accept money in person and I had to funnel the money to her through our attorneys. I stopped paying her because I moved out of my parents house (since I was kicked out of my house I could not afford my own place at the time) and my financial situation changed, plus she never gave me an address to send it to and I'm not paying my attorney to deal with this crap.
With all the BS she pulls am I going to have to pay? I don't have a problem paying I just don't want to get screwed.

And now we have to start the trial all over.  I was so close to finalizing this 2+ year divorce and now I have to start over.  The first judge was hesitant to give me half custody so he only gave me about 45% percent.  Now I have to worry if this new judge is biased and will undo every thing I worked to get.  The case would have been settled a long time ago but due to her and her stall tactics it has been prolonged.  The child will start school in two years and I wish to file for full custody since we live in seperate cities, but now this might throw a monkey wrench into everything.  I swear they are playing favor to her because if they were not then I would have half custody now.  I am so freakin' sick of this shit!  Any advice?

I am concerned that my ex will falsely accuse me of something.  What type of evidence would she need to do so?  Is it generally based off of her accusation and  Iam guilty until proven innocent?  If my previous experience is any indication then it would seem that if she says something it is considered fact until I disprove it.

Are you originally from the inland empire?  Your story sounds similar to a friend of mine who is stationed in SD.  Anyways, you should talk to an attorney.  I understand that it might be difficultbeing that it has been three years and you are in the military, but nothing is impossible.  I'm sure lots of people can give you advice from their own experience but each is unique.  You should really talk to a father's rights attny.  

In your experience did you find that you had to prove mother unfit 100% before you got full custody?  I hear that a lot and am aware of the gender bias in regards to child cutsody and if that is the case why is it that I must prove she is unfit?  Why does she not have to prove I am unfit in order for her to get full custody?  

Currently I am working on getting a permanent residence, one that I own.  my daughter will have her own bed room in a nice neighbor hood.  I am financially and emotionally stable.  her and I have a great bond as well and I am sure any court appointed mediator/psychologist will see that.  
My problem lies with her.  She refuses to disclose her address to me even though she has been ordered to do so.  She keeps giving me fake addresses everytime I go to court.  She does not let me speak to my daughter on the phone.  I have 50/50 custody.  She does not speak to me regarding co-parenting issues, in fact she does not speak to me period.  
After the divorce she filed a restraining order and moved far away.  She tried to take my child but I fought in court and won 50% custody.  My daughter is only 2 and will be going to kindergarden soon and  Iwant to win full custody.  She is not stable, neither financially nor emotionally.
My question is:  how can I put my self in the best possible senerio to win full custody when she starts school?
What was your experience with winning full custody?