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well said Davy

phil....
my focus is legal... if the CO at the very least contains a portion referring to following doctors advice, giving proper medications the OP can file for contempt. and BM telling the OP personally that she didn't give the child all the meds can be enough. depends on the judge. and on that basis have additional more strict wording entered into the CO.
with a cps investigation... i did achieve this contempt. it can be done. even without a no-smoking clause.

my other question as to whether or not the asthma developed after the CO was entered... goes to substantial change. it constitutes substantial change.

the OP just needs to collect as much documentation as possible. and yes the test will work since it tests for exposure in the last 24 hours. so if an appointment is made for the day the child returns from BM's house. doesn't mean that BM smoked but reasonable enough to show that despite the doctors caution she allowed someone to expose the child to smoke since the child was not in the possession of the OP.

it can work... just have to get ducks in a row. and for the sake of a child a parent would do everything in their power to warn the court of the possible threat to their child.

I have been in this situation and went to court.

oh NO!  if BM isn't giving the full dosage of the steroid she is actually doing more harm than good. you must inform the doctor of this.
not properly administering prescribed medications for lung disease coupled with second hand smoke exposure is MEDICAL NEGLECT.

is the child seeing a specialist (pulmonologist)? larger clinics even have a large (step-in) approximately 6-7 ft tall spirometry machine. this machine is vital in measuring inspiratory and expiratory air flow.

during a flare-up the child probably needs albuterol or xopenex via nebulizer every 4 hours as well as the oral steroid.

the child's lungs can be permanently damaged from recurrent attacks. it is called lung remapping.

think about a machine, with moving parts. if you toss sand in it every once and a while... it still may work. not as well. and over a long time of having sand in its moving parts you can bet it will not function as well down the road.

please document everything... every event. get copies of medical records, ER records. you will also need to prove that she smokes in the child's presence. that is very difficult. so other than what i have said to do... if you can get photos or video that would be even better. i cannot advise on how to obtain this evidence unless you hire a PI, like i did.

otherwise, it is very difficult to prove it happens.

did you say whether you had a part in your CO about following medical orders/advice/prescriptions?
if it is there, you can file for contempt yourself.

oh... and did the asthma develop after the CO was entered or before?

DDS....  i think that is precisely my point. changing the schedule is harmful to the child(ren). they need stability and routine. even at 4 months old. the schedule you set now effects the rest of your child's life.
i re-read this.... and i don't want you to get me wrong. i don't mean that the schedule BM is setting should remain. i mean that when you are setting up a 50/50 shared plan it should stick. it should be thought of in the long term. children rely on this routine for emotional wellbeing.

i absolutely feel you should go for 50/50. that is best for your child. you both will be in my prayers.

experiencing a rotating schedule in an uncooperative, non co-parenting friendly parent relationship.... i can say to you that i would at the very least rethink the schedule that you have in mind.

our children, 3 and 5 at the time of implementation, have adapted tremendously. however, now i can see where the schedule could be less of a burden on them. if i could convince the other parent that reducing the number of exchanges would be more beneficial to the children, our schedule would be less complicated for our children.

if you live within 5 miles of the other parent and have a cooperative co-parenting relationship, a 3/3 rotation can absolutely work and be healthy for the children.

otherwise, the shifting/transfer from household to household becomes burdensome as they get older. different households, different rules; letting their friends know what number to call them at or if they will have a computer available to them, etc... most of the time, because of the alternating weekend (or saturday like you are suggesting) my husband and I cannot keep up with the schedule without keeping a calendar. it is confusing for the parents. even when I have tried to provide them with calendars.
the adjustment period when arriving at either parent's household can be 1-2 days of irritability.

I am absolutely an advocate of 50/50 rotating schedules. it is the best thing for the children when implemented in the right manner. and what works for one family may not work for another. but what to look at first is what schedule is best for the children... not the parents.

my suggestion would be to consider a full one or two week rotation (two week is preferable)

just my experience... hope it helps.
our children are now 10 and 12

take the child directly to the pediatrician. the doc with talk with the child and of course can smell the smoke on the child. also take a tobaccalert test that you can purchase at a local pharmacy. it is a urine test for second hand smoke exposure. this will document the ACUTAL amount of exposure.

the pediatrician is obligated to contact child protective services for medical neglect. (i know this because i have been in the exact same situation and unbeknownst to me dd's pediatrician called cps)

is the child's asthma exacerbated by the second hand smoke exposure? DOCUMENT
has he/she been to the ER on steroids, etc... DOCUMENT


also, does your CO contain any wording that refers to both parents following physicians medical advice or medical care?
if so, file contempt.

actually i talked to the probate court clerk. she said that they usually send a mental health professional over from a neighboring town. that's why i don't get why they are now using pcp.

no court date yet. certainly no proof, other than what they say. PCP (primary care physician) her primary doctor that she hasn't been seeing very long.

that is what has happened. the BF has become very close to the BM father. together, they have filed for this involuntary treatment. i spend every day with this person and her child. as well as have dealt with her father and husband.

none of what they say is true. so how does she beat this if they have provided false information?

does anyone have any information on this? the allegations are false and stem from the fact that the BM kicked the BF out of the house for drugs and aggressive behavior.

haven't seen the documents, but hear it is alleging anger. and that the BM is to be at the PCP's office at 2pm tomorrow.
this has not been served by law enforcement yet.

not trusting this situation. this is a very small town. the BF and assisting party are very well connected with the probate court and law enforcement.

so, i am confused. shouldn't this evaluation be conducted by a mental health professional, not the pcp?

any help is appreciated