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In California, you can quit the second job at any time if your first job is a fulltime job!  You are not required to have a second job!  I just paid my attorney $350.00 yesterday to give me that bit of good news.  If you choose to keep the second job then it will be considered in the child support calculation though.

You are right KittyC.  To the OP, if your man happens to be in California, then his chance is sooooo good!  Regardless, not having a court ordered cutody or visitation is dangerous

Good luck to you!!!  I hope you get a very nice visit with your daughter very soon!!

Good luck!  it is nice that you both are so reasonable with each other.  Please get this agreement official with the courts before she leaves - just in case anyone changes their mind for a not so ethical reason.  Good luck!

If you are working and he is not then you will end up paying him child support.  Maybe you should move near the dad and get back on public assistance and spend that extra time with your kids - helping them transition in the new state.  What a tough situation. Good luck

How terrible.  It seems like the courts are punishing you for not moving back to NJ per their order.  You have more than paid the price for that, too bad they are not treating you the way you have earned and deserve.  I know how horrible you must feel!  Your ex is evil.  My ex is evil too and trying to destroy me still after 8 years of divorce.  His parents keep funding all of his court actions against me, so I will never win because I don't have an endless supply of money to wear him down like he does me. 

Anyway, keep in contact with that counselor and keep trying to get your visitation.  Keep trying to show your daughter that you love her and need her and do not blame her for any of this.  She is being manipulated and will see that one day.  Hang in there!  You have been so strong so far!  He is only getting away with this because of money, if character were the determining factor in these cases then you would win hands down.  Keep trying!  Good luck!!!   

Can you get back in court to request specified visitation dates and bring copies of emails or letters from him not allowing you to visit?  Your kids need you!  There has to be something you can do.  Good luck

You raised the kids for 15 years?  Why aren't they demanding to be allowed to talk to you?  That is strange!  Try every single day to communicate with them, try to call, write a letter every day.  If you are not able to remind your kids of how much you love them, then you should show up there unannounced at their school or something, so that you can explain to your kids that you love them and the efforts you have been making so that they know you care and love them.  He may be telling them that you aren't calling and you don't lcare about them.  Prove to them you are making the effort.  If they were with you for 15 years I am surprised they would believe this though.  I'm glad you got an attorney, telephone contact should be mandatory and uninterfered with by your ex!  Doesn't he remember how hard it was for him to be apart from the kids?  Why is he denying contact to you?  That is horrible - I am so sorry! 

If you can prove he owed you back support and that you didn't receive it, maybe that can be a bargaining chip in your support hearing.  Good luck

That poor boy!!!  He is crying out for help with that cutting!   Is there any chance that you and fiance can move near the mom for awhile?  Is there anyway you can try to make a deal with the boy that if he stay with you one year and attend counseling for the cutting and abandonment issues that you will do something special for him, like a car?  I hate resorting to bribes but he needs some kind of help!  I am so desperate for more time with my son, I can't imagine a mom trying to get rid of her son that needs her!  She is dispicable and shouldn't be around a psycho like that anyway!  I know he is not your biological son, but if you can put him first and foremost in your life, you will probably save him from a lot of painful self destruction.  Good luck

Can you show who ever is listening to her the entire mortgage bill  and daycare bill that you are paying every month that she is responsible and the document with your next court date listed on it?  It is silly for them to listen to her.  She is getting off very lucky with what you are paying while she is working full time!!  Your employer should realize that if they can see it on paper.  Good luck! Dang!  Where are the amicable divorces?  I am so jealous of the ones who have one!