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She doesnt deny them now but in February '06 she he went to pick them up and there was a note saying "I do not believe the children are safe with you"  She only let them come over when he threatened to call the sheriff and charge her with kidnapping.  She also denied him visitation from Nov. 2007 to dec. 2007.  He wont file contempt because he feels that since he is the man even though she is the one in contempt, and it states that whoever is in contempt will have to pay both parites attorney costs, that the judge will order that they have to both pay for attornies and we cant really afford it.  He is just convinced that he will get screwed because he is the man and he got screwed on the original order/decree.

So yes she has actually denied visits.  And she will probably do the same this summer when he goes to pick them up and they will most likely not be there.  The change was in the best interest of the children so that he could provide for them (it was his only job offer).

We really just want a custody revision since she wont compromise out of court.  We just want it on paper so she cant violate anything and there is an actual order with the courts.  He has attempted to see them several times but she always has them somewhere else or just wont let them see him.  She makes them call him by his first name and makes them call their step dad "dad" and my step son has said that she tries to turn them against my husband.

They have legal joint custody but since she has primary it is written that she has to inform him of all changes. (it is in the decree)  Even though he is supposed to have a decision she never gives him one.

Let me know if this is enough info.

My husband is 27 and has two kids from his previous marriage.  They are 7 and 4. (we also have 2 kids together).  We used to live in the same town as they did but when we graduated from college last year we moved 4 hours away.  It is written in the decree that we are allowed to present a change of custody and my husband and the ex can work something out.  Our problem is she will not negotiate with him at all.  He wants to see his kids and they want to see him but for her own selfish reasons she wont let him budge on the current order.  The current order says we have them every other weekend and since it is stated that he is supposed to be responsible for all transportation he would have to go get them and drop them off.  She wants him to drive down every other weekend to get them if he wants to see them.  We were trying to negotiate having them more in the summer to make up for lost time but she wont negotiate, she keeps hanging up on him.  She has violated several of the clauses in their divorce decree over the past 3 years.  We want to file for some sort of joint custody where we would have them all summer and over most of Christmas break switching off Christmas every other year.  We also want to put in the new order for both parties to be equally responsible for travel...meeting half way.  My husband has a great job, we have a 3 bedroom house, and the kids love their father.  We have realized that if we want to have them we are going to have to go through lawyers/court.  What are the odds that we would be awarded more custody?  Would we be able to file for primary?  (Ex wife doesnt have a job but is remarried to a guy that does)  Like i said before she has violated clauses:  she decided on her own that the kids were not safe with us and wouldnt let them come over which is not for her to decided (these claims were later found unsubstantiated and made up by DFS).  She doesnt inform my husband of anything that the kids have going on in school, doctors, etc.  like she is supposed to.  She pulled my step daughter out of school and didnt inform my husband.  Several other things too.  My big question is should we try to get them or since he is the man would we just get screwed over like we do with his child support?  (we live in missouri if that helps)