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Messages - PhilaDaddy

#1
Father's Issues / Need advice for a bad situation
Sep 21, 2009, 02:24:38 PM
I am the father of a beautiful 5 year old boy.  The mother and myself have been separated for a year and a half with no formal custody drawn out.  Everything has been going well until I discovered that my mother's partner (she is lesbian now) was physically abusive to my son's mother.  My son was a witness to this abuse.  Upon further examination, I have also found out that my son's mother was also physically abusive to her partner.  This argument was severe enough that the police were called.  I confronted my son's mother about these things and she confirmed them.  I have tried everything in my power to be as fair as possible as to living arrangements but with this knowledge, I cannot with a sane heart allow my son to be in that house with two physically abusive people.  Another thing that bothers me, but I don't know if this matters, is that my son's mother has allowed her partner to bring her very sick grandfather to live with them. I believe that the only reason they have this man living there, in the living room, is because his monthly stipends (I believe he gets SSI and something else) pays the bills in the house.  Because of this man, the entire 1st floor of her house is now this poor man's bedroom and bathroom (he is invalid). My home is a very stable place for my son.  All of his friends live within 1/2 block from where I live.  I have been paying for school (pre-school and now private catholic school) without any assistance from her.  I pay for all the clothes, medicine, health care, etc... . I pick him up and drop him off from school every day.  I am self-employed which gives me a lot of negotiating room so I can be where ever my son needs me to be.  His mother works part time. She is on unemployment and also wants to use my son as leverage to get welfare.

Before she gets a chance to possibly try to take my son away from me or file for child support, I want to file for full custody.  What steps can I take? The only family lawyer I have had contact with took my money and then I didn't hear from him for 1.5 months.  I need a recommendation for a lawyer in the Philadelphia area.  Any experience anyone has or experience anyone can share as to what I can/should do would be greatly appreciated.