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Messages - Lindma

#1
Has anyone had to do this before?
Do you know if they make the support retroactive to the date you file for the mod?
#2
Child Support Issues / New baby - support mod?
Feb 23, 2012, 09:17:19 AM
My husband and I just had a new baby. Does DSHS (WA state) adjust for this change, or do we have to file new paper work and jump through all the hoops in court to make the adjustment?
If anyone has any insight your input is greatly appreciated. :)
#3
General Issues / Jurisdiction
Apr 27, 2011, 09:48:30 AM
Hi everyone - I have a question regarding jurisdicition.

If the children no longer live in the state and or country where their Parenting Plan was established, can jurisdiction be changed to where the children are now residing? (the non-custodial parent still lives in county where the parenting plan was established, but will be moving soon)

I have been reading up on this topic and have been getting different answers. Rather confused now.

Thank you in advance.
#4
Phew - what an afternoon.

Just an update. My husband extended the olive branch to his ex via phone call this afternoon (this is not the first attempt by any means)  He said he would like to lay the groundwork for a business relationship with her. He nicely suggested a shared calendar that would benefit the children. She flatly refused. She said she wants ZERO communication, doesn't trust my husband etc, etc. (FYI - she doesn't have a great reputation in the community, which is a result of her actions.)

From the conversation, it is quite clear that her hatred for my husband outweighs the love a mother should technically have for her children.

My husband has been willing for quite some time to establish a working business relationship because he knows that the children will benefit knowing their parents are on the same page, not to mention their mental development.

Question is, now what? Mediation? Family therapy? The oldest child is already in the care of social services b/c mother could not handle her. Talk to them?

I know from the other posts it is suggested to file contempt, but does that really rectify the situation? She'll probably keep breaking the CO
Help :(
#5
I live in WA state.

If your ex is claiming that you make more to receive more support, good on her. Where's her proof?
The judge will want to see your last two years tax returns. They will then take an average of those two years (this is what they did in our case) and use that to determine child support.

It sounds as though your ex is lazy to say the least, and she needs to start contributing.
#6
From my experience, and the research i've done, a 10 yr. old is not by any means old enough etc etc., to determine visitation. You and your ex should have a discussion about the visitation and decide upon it yourselves. Children do not dicatate the visitation schedule at that age. (unless there is abuse, etc etc, that's a whole different story)

I don't know where you are located, but I know in my state, there are residential guidelines. These guidelines are instructional as to what guidelines the courts use when determining residential placement and parenting plans for children.
#7
Thank you Ocean - great information!
#8
Visitation Issues / Visitation schedule - really?
Apr 15, 2011, 02:03:59 PM
I'll try and be brief here, and outline the main points.

February 2007 - divorce decree finalized and parenting plan put into place. Father gets children EVERY weekend and alternating school breaks

August 2007 - Ex - wife remarries my husbands ex best bud (nice guy huh)

April 2008 - I marry my husband

Oct 1 2009 - we file for reduction in support since husband had a severe reduction in income. We received a significant reduction in support.
Ex wife files for new visitation order. She lied and said that there was "an established pattern that the children only saw Dad every other weekend"  She won.

......dad sees kids everyother weekend.....life is fine......then

February 2010 - kids are told they only have to see Dad "when they want to"
FYI:  supposed to share driving, her husband says he drives the kids enough already, so won't share the visitation driving) We do all the driving - no problem. Not fighting this battle (they only live 30 mins away)

April 2010 - sent ex wife certified mail with "intent to excercise visitation"
           - no response

May 2010 - April 2010:  kids(9 and 12) come over once every two months or so, basically "when they want" Husband calls kids every other day, asks them to go out for a movie, swimming, aquarium whatever. He offers to pick them up from their mother's bring them back to our home, drive them back to their mothers etc. Tries to stay involved as much as possible.


If we file for contempt, we are concerned she will counter that with a "new established pattern" of the kids coming over when they want?  From my understanding, every other weekend visitation is pretty typical. What's worse than everyother weekend, mother gettting full-custody?!? I have no idea.

Is it better to just leave it how it is, or file? Or, call her lawyer and tell her her client is not following the pareting plan?

Just a side note: the ex's new husband was diagnosed with OCD and ADHD (he told this to my husband when they were best friends) Ever since she married him, it's been a gradual push to get my husband out of the childrens' lives. We're both guessing Parental Alienation Syndrom (although this is hard to prove.) Kids are nervous on the phone, have to ask their mom permission to see their Dad. The youngest son (9) WANTED to come over this weekend, and the mother said "no, we have company over."

So lost as to what to do? Thanks for any inpute :)