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Thanks Sherri.  Darn it.  I never even thought about them taking into consideration that she has two more kids.  Maybe I better get busy and pop out a few more.  LMAO.  Well, now I'm scared to even try to get it lowered because it could end up worse than it is now.  This really sucks.  It's so not fair!!  I think they did give us a sheet.  I'll find it when I get home and see if I can understand it.  
SD is on my insurance but I'm a teacher so I have a great plan and don't pay all that much, when you split it 4 ways it's probably less than $15 a month for her.  
Thanks for the help.

Best Wishes,
Sarah

Well, shoot, does that mean they'll take into account that SHE now has two other kids?  I never even thought about that.

Best Wishes,
stepmom2morgan

Hi, my name is Sarah and I'm 30.  I'm married to Derek who is 25 (yep, I'm a cradle robber).  I have a wonderful SD Morgan that just turned 6.  We went through hell for the first 3 years of her life just to get standard visitation.  BM and Derek were never married, never even boyfriend and girlfriend actually, and she just wanted him to go away so her new man could be the daddy.  Finally the judge ordered a psych eval of me, Derek, BM, BM's husband, and Morgan.  After that the judge told BM that Morgan was lucky to have Derek and me in her life and if she sees us in court again she will give Derek full custody and the only reason she's not doing it now is because of how young she is.  After that BM has straightened up and flown right for the most part.  We still have issues but nothing you'd end up back in court for.  Derek and BM are learning to work things out on their own (usually with lucky me as the mediator).  Anywhoo, in April of 2004 we added our darling son Elijah to our family.  He is a constant joy, I just feel sad that we can't provide for him the manner we'd like to because CS and lawyer fees have/are draining us financially.  Nice to meet you!

Best Wishes,
stepmom2morgan

We're trying to decide if we should try to get CS lowered.  The main thing that has changed is that my DH and I have a son together now.  Does anybody know how they look at that in a CS review?  Is there a certain percentage they take from your total income or what?  Sherri, I know you said it was something like $3000 for you but since I don't know how much your DH makes that doesn't really tell me what it would be for us.
I just don't want to do this if it's not going to be worth it.  We are getting along with BM right now but this might piss her off.  It would be worth a little conflict though if we could get it lowered because the CS is just draining us right now.  Our quality of life compared to BM's quality of life is just rediculous.  Not that the courts care about that.

Best Wishes,
stepmom2morgan

The laws suck.  They are so skewed in the CP (read: mother 99% of the time) that it's rediculous!  We have it in our court order that we get to claim my SD every other year but it's hardly even worth the hassle.  You have to send in all this extra paperword to prove you have the right to claim her.  Because she doesn't live with us 50% of the year (like that was our choice) she doesn't count in the way that my son counts.  (I'm not sure all the correct terminology).  We don't get even half of what we get back for claiming our son.  Who cares that my son doesn't even have a room because the bedroom in our 2 bedroom half-double already belonged to her when he was born and we didn't want to kick her out of it and we can't afford anything bigger.  Who cares that our SD has all the clothes and toys that she would have if she lived with us full-time.  Who cares that WE and only we are the ones carrying medical insurance on her.  Meanwhile her mom gets to stay at home, keep spitting out babies that live in the house that she owns and drive her 2004 Entourage around.  Argh.

Best Wishes,
stepmom2morgan

"I give up!! The system does not want to help the fathers,they only want the money.You hear in the news about all these so called dead beat dads,but you never hear anything on T.V. about all these mothers milking the system for years."

Unfortunately that is the truth.  It totally sucks and makes me scared for my son when he grows up.  All I pray is that the girl he chooses to be the mother of his children won't turn pyscho on him.

Best Wishes,
stepmom2morgan

Thanks for replying.  I'm sorry you guys are going through all the drama of a hostile custodial parent.  It trully sucks I know.  My SD's BM put us through all kinds of hell for the first 2 + years of her life but she finally realized we would never stop fighting and that she was only hurting herself when the judge finally told her if she saw her in her courtroom again she would award custody to my DH!
Since then (3 years) we've gotten along beautifully for the most part, maybe even genuinely at this point (though I'd never trust her completely).  Even when her and DH disagree (sometimes even fight) they have learned it's better to just work it out together than take it back to court.  We will make our final payment to our attorney next month (he let us pay him $50 a month).  It's only the child support and our evil case manager that chaff me now.  
How is is fair that BM and her husband own their own house, two very nice cars, an RV and other toys, she stays at home and they could afford to have 2 more kids besides SD and meanwhile we are stuck renting a 2 bedroom half double (my 18 month old DS doesn't have a bedroom because we didn't kick DD out of hers when he was born), driving 1991 cars, working seperate shifts because we can't afford child care, wanting to have another child soon but knowing we can't because we can't afford the one we have?  I mean during the time DD stays with us she has the bedroom and all the toys and clothes that she would have if she lived with us full-time but yet DH is expected to provide the money to supply all those same things at her mother's house.  It's not fair!  The only difference between BM and us as far as how DD gets treated is that they get more TIME with her.  Money-wise there is no difference, in fact we also carry the health insurance for DD so maybe we even spend more.  And of course we would love to have MORE time with DD!  And every time we have to deal with our case manager she treats DH like he's a no good dead beat dad.  It makes me crazy!  Oh well.  It could be worse.  She could still be fighting us.

Best Wishes,
stepmom2morgan

Oh my god that makes me so mad!!!  He had only missed 3 consecutive months of payments and was only $1000 behind!  How would I get my hands on those guidelines?  I didn't know there were guidelines.  His case manager told him it was up to her!

I guess it doesn't really matter now because he does have his license back but I would love to get that witch in trouble!

Thanks for that info!  Very interesting!

Best Wishes,
stepmom2morgan

Hi. My DH lost his license in Feb because he lost his job and hadn't paid support for 3 months. His CSE case manager is a witch, he wasn't even $1000 behind. (I've caught her in two mistakes saying we owe money we don't and she seems to hate us since then). Anywhoo, that's besides the point. He finally found a job. He calls the case manager and asks what he has to do to get his license back. She says she wants half of what he owes. We won't be able to pull that off for at least a couple weeks.

We live out in the country so taxis or public transportation are not options for us. Also I will be at work during the time he has to drive to and from work. The only option is for him to drive without a license which we hate to take that chance but he has to keep this job! It took so long for him to find it! The economy sucks around here.

So he asked if he could at least have work driving priveleges but she said no they don't do that. I don't understand. Even people who lose their licenses for driving infractions often at least have work priveleges!

Is she full of it and just telling my DH this because she always wants to give us a hard time? Does anybody out there know more about this than we do? Any input would be great. I will fight her, go to her supervisor or whatever, if I know there is a point to it but if there is no point I'd rather not fight because she hates us enough as it is. Thanks so much!

BTW we live in Miami County.

Best Wishes,
stepmom2morgan

My dh is behind in CS so they garnished our tax return. No big deal except they did not immediately apply it to his arreage. They say they have to wait 6 months because, as his spouse, I have 6 months to fight it. I don't want to fight it but there doesn't appear to be any way for me to make that clear to them. So there is $1900 out there just floating around. BM doesn't get it, we don't get it. It's so stupid I could scream. Anyway, we plan to have at least half of what he owes paid down way before the 6 months is up. I don't think we will owe nearly $1900 by the time they can apply it. So my question is what happens to the money that is left over from that $1900 after they apply what's necessary to clear his arreage? Say there's $500 left over. Will we get that back or will they credit it to his account or what? BTW, we live in Miami County. Thanks!

Best Wishes,
stepmom2morgan