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My wife claims to have filed legal separation papers.  She says this was done, well, by now it would have been over a month ago.  I'm in Contra Costa county - when I search the county web site nothing appears in either my wife's name (maiden or married) or in my name.  I have not been served. 

I have seen the papers - she did have them notarized by someone who is a local notary in our town.  She tells me I don't have to sign and that she doesn't have to serve me.  Now, I know, well, no, in fact I don't know what this means.  I think her motivation is to protect herself from the fact that she is having an emotional affair (at this point) with an old high school boyfriend, and she thinks filing protects her.  I've been trying to get her to tell me what the heck she's doing - that California is a no fault state and that her having this boyfriend really doesn't matter too much in the grand scheme of things so long as it doesn't affect her ability to be a parent...and that's an entirely different story and thread I'll start later.

Does anyone know?  Are we legally separated if I haven't been served?  I'm confused and I'm not sure what to do at this point to protect myself.