We had/have similar issues although there is no DVI....
Suggestion - the next time your ex says she will make the exchange at the police station - agree.
Then go directly to the police station (do NOT wait until the exchange - go days or weeks early), introduce yourself, show them the current DVI and current order and let them know that your ex is insisting on exchanging the kids there at the station and ask, pretty please, if one of the officers will just stand and watch the exchange since #1 you do not want to violate the current court order #2 you do not want to violate the DVI #3 you do want visitation with your children. Then at the appointed day for the exchange, get to the station a little early and ask for the officer to witness the exchange. Apologize for the inconvenience and thank them for their assistance.
We had to do this with the ex just one time and now she only insists on exchanges in the parking lot instead of inside with "witnesses" "just in case" something happens.
Suggestion - the next time your ex says she will make the exchange at the police station - agree.
Then go directly to the police station (do NOT wait until the exchange - go days or weeks early), introduce yourself, show them the current DVI and current order and let them know that your ex is insisting on exchanging the kids there at the station and ask, pretty please, if one of the officers will just stand and watch the exchange since #1 you do not want to violate the current court order #2 you do not want to violate the DVI #3 you do want visitation with your children. Then at the appointed day for the exchange, get to the station a little early and ask for the officer to witness the exchange. Apologize for the inconvenience and thank them for their assistance.
We had to do this with the ex just one time and now she only insists on exchanges in the parking lot instead of inside with "witnesses" "just in case" something happens.