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Topics - stepma

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Child Support Issues / Deviation for Diabetes?
« on: Apr 06, 2005, 10:17:28 PM »
Our C.S. is in Missouri and we are pro se and I just read that a deviation is allowed if parent paying support has significant extraordinary medical expenses. Unreimbursed medical expenses that exceed $250.00 per family member per year are deemed extraordinary medical expenses.  My DH spends at least $1000 a year for supplies and minimal doctors expenses, we don't have insurance. Has anybody ever done this? and if so how should I go about it from a pro se standpoint. we are currently going through a modification, and have just received an interrogatory.

My DH's CS is going to Missouri family support center through wage garnishment. As of Oct. our arrearage was caught up and we were over paying by $50. They added the regular Nov. CS payment to October and now when they get both of DH's CS check for the month of Nov. they will owe us somewhere around $150. I spoke to our case worker a few months ago and she assured me a letter would be sent as soon as the arrearages were paid. I just don't understand why they put the month of Nov. into arrearage when Nov. isn't even over yet. Are we allowed to write the CS center and ask for our overpayed money when they finally decide we are paying current support or is that money lost forever?? How long does it usually take them to send a letter to lower the payments? I'm afraid they will just keep adding the next month to arrearages and we'll be up the creek without a paddle. I do not believe that the CS center has a right to hold on to any money that isn't immediatley owed to the CP and call it "future support" so they can make interest off of it for the next 14 years. Has anybody ever dealt with this??

General Issues / Here's a toughie????
« on: Nov 18, 2004, 01:54:41 PM »
On our recent visit to ss we went to his school to give my DH's info so we could start receiving report cards, school pic order form, etc... The school informed us that he no longer attended and found out which school bio mom had transferred him to for us. We went to that school and spoke to teacher and administration and asked for imortant info to be sent. We also sent a letter to bio mom stating that we needed to know which school he had been transferred to so we could give them this info even though we already knew..... (document, document, document). Bio mom sends a letter back stating that "decree does not state she is to inform us of anything, but in the spirit of keeping us informed she will send his next report card when she gets it and we can get the info from that". Today my DH called school and spoke directly with teacher wondering why we haven't recieved anything, the teacher informed my dh that bio mom gave her a copy of the decree which states " school shall communicate to husband through wife" so NO the school will NOT send us anything. Bio mom does not send anything to us and dh would rather deal with school. I NEED HELP???? Does that really mean the school doesn't have to send us anything?

Visitation Issues / I need HELP! :o
« on: Apr 01, 2005, 08:48:33 PM »
We were sent an interrogatory in the mail today and we are Pro Se.
I do not believe that this was served through the court.
We are going to send one back but for the certificate of service PBFH's lawyer signed. So my question is who signs ours saying that they certify a true and correct copy was sent in the mail???? my DH?? a notary??

 I'm confused please HELP............

Do lawyers even do that? tell the Custodial parent to deny visitation when the whole reason she had to get a lawyer is because we filed a motion for family access due to (BIG SURPRISE) her denying visitation.

We haven't seen my DSS since August 2004 for only 2 days. We are owed 14 days visitation from last year and this PBFH is being a complete A**. We finally did something about it and our court date was set for March 14. So we wrote a letter asking for visitation while we are in DSS's state ( we live 1000 miles away) and PBFH sends a letter declining visitation because her lawyer advised her to do so>???? ARRRRRAGHHHHH!!!!!!!  x(

Visitation Issues / Opening statement .any suggestions?
« on: Feb 04, 2005, 02:11:51 AM »
We are finally going to do something about not seeing my DSS. We have filed for a Motion for Family Access in Missouri. We are doing this pro se and because of this GREAT! web site I believe the PBFH won't have a chance. Here is the rough draft of the opening statement any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.........

XXX is frustrating my visitation by refusing to bring my (child) to XXXXXX to complete a weekend visit which is outlined in our Divorce Decree. XXX denied visitation in a letter dated XXX which resulted in the loss of 5 days visitation in the summer of 2004. XXX also denied visitation in a letter dated XXXX which caused me to lose another 7 days visitation. In this letter XXX also states that my (child) will not be flying for any of (their) visits even though our Divorce Decree requires XXX to pick up and drop off our (child) at an airport, for (their) regularly scheduled visitation. XXX will not tell me the name of my (child's) school because she does not want me communicating with the school. I have a copy of my (child's) report card that XXX sent to me with the school name and also the teacher's name blacked out. I have lost a total of twelve days visitation with XXXX and XXX"s refusal to cooperate is causing serious detriment to the healthy relationship between me and my son.

Visitation Issues / A letter from Santa....
« on: Jan 01, 2005, 07:49:58 PM »
I'm sure this is the wrong board.......

My DH was denied visitation again but we have it very well documented this time :)

Anyway, while talking to DSS on the phone DSS said he got a letter from Santa and read it to my DH. The letter said that DSS's mom, grandma,grandpa, and teacher were all good people and that he should be a good boy and listen to them and he will get presents next year. The letter didn't say anything about dad, I find that kind of mean. Does this sound like brain washing to you?

Visitation Issues / Airplane or automobile??
« on: Oct 10, 2004, 12:34:43 PM »
My DH's visitation order is finally at the point where ex "transports" DSS to us for a weekend( we live 1100 miles apart).  I called her to find out which days she had off so I could send her our notice of intent.... so we could get all of the fighting finished before the x-mas holidays. She tells me she is getting a week off and wants to visit family in our state and that if we rented her a car she would drop off/pick up DSS at a halfway point. The whole reason for her transporting DSS is because it will be his first time on a plane and after this visit he will be doing it by himself. She didn't seem to care about that and mentioned how much money she would be saving us (not much). If we rent her a car and meet halfway it would be the same as us driving all the way to DSS's home state and back, which is pointless. So my question is: if a war starts because she refuses to put DSS on a plane, is that considered contempt ? frustration of visitation? Or should we just give up, give in, and get it over with?x(

Visitation Issues / Visitation FRUSTRATION??!!
« on: Jun 08, 2004, 01:45:12 PM »
Sorry so long....
Divorce agreement states my DH gets 2 days per month every three months for a year (which equals 24 days in 1 year right?)because son lives in another state.The year has passed... and we have visited DSS for 24 days, it just didn't take 4 visits to do it. After this is completed(within a reasonable time frame) EX is to bring DSS for a weekend to us(we pay) then a regular visitation starts starting with 1 week in summer of 2004.

The whole reason for all of this is so father and son can re-bond so son will be comfortable visiting dad out of state.......

We think its time for the weekend visit, EX thinks my DH still needs to visit out of state 2 more times.

So my questions are:

1. What counts more: amount of days visited? or how many times DH travels out of state?

2. If DH gives in and travels out of state 1 or 2 more times doesn't that mess up the whole reasonable time frame thing? we miss our 1 week here in summer and probably have to cut winter visit to 2 days instead of 1 week.

3. How does everybody else here deal with complicated visitation schedules and EXes that are trying to sever NCP and child relationship completely?

4. When do we get to the point where we can take her to court for interference with visitation?

I am just completly confused, this woman sabotages everything and she doesn't care if her son gets hurt as long as she gets revenge. She is completly unreasonable and is even doing things that would be considered P.A.S. but from what I read here if we take this and all of the other things that make her look unstable and abusive to court we still don't have a very good chance of getting custody! Thanks for any advice or similar stories with good outcomes.

P.S. Ex had phone cut off without providing new #. It took us 3 weeks to of us leaving messsages at EXes parents house before she called us back and gave a new #

Is that considered contempt ?

When she did finally call back the first thing I asked was "did you move? " she said no. But just recently(three months after the ph# incident) she sent notice that she moved. The letter was sent on May 7th, dated May 10th and stated "As of above date this is new address......." That gives us exactly 0 days of notice. I think the Decree states "60 days notice" and the last time I checked you have to give 30 to your landlord when you move.
Is that considered contempt?

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