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Maybe I missed something..... but the insurance is about the child, get over the money.  How are you going feel when the emergency room refuses to treat your child because of lack of insurance, i.e. no card?

The insurance card is only a symptom of your underlying problem, which seems to be control or maybe lack of control over your child. Address the problem not the sympton. Don't know your facts, but the parent with custody decides the doctor not who carries the insurance.   If you have joint custody, hopefully your court order states who gets to make the final medical decision.   If she causing medical confusion, take it back to court for clarification.

If your ex owes you money for medical, go after it all the way to court.  Otherwise it's not really important to the issue.  When your ex starts paying maybe they will think twice about incurring a frivolous medical debt.  As for perferred providers, unless it's in the court order your probably out of luck.  


I understand your frustration with insurance,  DH's ex successfully had his insurance cancelled because "she" was the custodial parent even though there was a court order directing DH to provide insurance.  What a hugh mess.  It took 6 months of fighting to get everything corrected.  But, it never ends with her.   She's always up to something.  Just waiting for the next salvo.  Best of Luck.

LizaLou

Why not get married then?  Probably a million reasons not to, but in the balance be the best.  Tough situation, sorry.

LizaLou

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I would suggest you treat her exactly like you would want to be treated.  Take the high road.  What is the harm in her having medical and school info?  It is, what it is.  IMO, by withholding it looks like your hiding something.

My next statement is NOT about you so don't get offended.  But too many times the legal system/winner take all attitudes cause conflight where there should be none.  

Parents (plural) should raise children not the legal system.  It's so sad when a parent acts against the the best interest of their children because the hate their ex.  Been there with CPS, so I feel your pain.

LizaLou

From a working mom and wife.

LizaLou

I may have missed this somewhere, but what is the distance difference between the her house from where she asked to you to meet her, town xx?

If the difference is not too far I suggest you pick up the child in town xx BUT stay at home on Sunday and wait for her to pick up the child at your residence.  If she gets piss off, oh well, your just following the court order.  I would not broadcast this was your plan, just do it.  This way you get to see the child.  

Is there a real mediation "agreement" between her and your DH?  Agreement implies both parties "agree" to something and that it's better a deal than court order.  So why fight the "agreement" if you made.  I believe the court would expect you to follow it until it gets court approved.    If there is no "agreement" just some PROPOSED agreement, the court order is certainly the correct way to go.

My DH drives approx 350  miles to pickup his kids at the court ordered half-way point.  He's made the drip 2 times to only find his visitation denied.  The 350 mile return trip is more than depressing.  So, we know your dissappointment.

Best of luck,

LizaLou

Well that's what I thought. The boards seem to balance out for all parties so I didn't understand the problem.

SPARC has been invaluable to us.  Thanks

LizaLou

message deleted.      

LizaLou

He just posted something on this subject.

LizaLou

Around my neck of the woods they release folks due to overcrowding in prison.  Not a good idea in my book, but it is a reality we live with.  

Given the option of this woman or a violent felon, I pick this woman.  I wonder if he considered sterilizing her first?  Just a thought.   Sick humor aside, maybe her community service will benefit some other person.

LizaLou