Quote from: Kitty C. on May 09, 2012, 09:05:51 AM
Simplydad gave a VERY good response, since it is apparent he's been there, done that. If I could add only one thing, it would be this: when you look at the entire situation from the standpoint of perspective, consider this....when he LOVES his child more than he HATES you, things will get a whole lot better. But that is only for him to decide.....
BT, DT, too.....
I agree. This is excellent advice.
But something caught my eye about your story--the time arrangement. I've been doing the 50/50, back-and-forth since my child was even younger. To me, a week away from either parent at that age seems very long. My arrangement at that age was that our child should never be apart from either parent longer than two days and a half days. Let me add that my ex takes High Conflict to an entirely new level. She turns even the most minor disagreement into emotional and psychological terrorism of unbelievable proportions. Avoidance of her really is the best way of handling it unless I want my entire day completely ruined.
Still, even with all of that destructive and sick behavior, I feel that the child's well-being is paramount, and at that age it meant as much regular time with each parent as possible. It goes without saying that the ex did not agree with me and felt that the less time with the father, the better. But she was and is just an extreme version of the classic high conflict ex. (With our child, she exhibits much, much less of this as far as I know, though I worry for the kid.)
A week on, week off would have been much easier for me, but not for the kid. For one thing, I would have seen much less of her. I don't know all the details of your situation, but it's worth thinking about.