Wow, this is all so sad. Looking at all of this -- the craziness, the expense, the energy drain -- I am not surprised at the spike in mental illness in kids. And it's been going on long enough that I guess we're looking at a new generation of young parents enmeshed in the same problems. This stuff just sounds like a disaster and I don't see yet how the kids learn how to do different. I'm a feminist and extremely independent, but hearing these stories, and going through the craziness of my own divorce (which is apparently a good one!) makes me think that really, unless one spouse is beating or ruining the other, the SOP ought to be to suck it up, maybe get a separate room or apartment somewhere so people can get away from each other, and otherwise just have quietly separate lives until the kids are launched. Then you can have your miserable nasty year or two in court without a custody battle, the kids have their own lives and some shelter from your lunacy, and then things can settle down again.
The kind of stories I'm reading here have me persuaded I should leave remarriage alone until after my daughter is grown and on her way, and make me hope x will find some nice, gentle, caring lady who doesn't want kids. Just to keep things simple, stable, and relatively inexpensive.
OK< I'm off to work & do something productive.
The kind of stories I'm reading here have me persuaded I should leave remarriage alone until after my daughter is grown and on her way, and make me hope x will find some nice, gentle, caring lady who doesn't want kids. Just to keep things simple, stable, and relatively inexpensive.
OK< I'm off to work & do something productive.