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Messages - asof2005

#21
Quote from: gemini3 on Nov 10, 2009, 01:02:08 PM


The current system allows these orders to be granted without any evidence except the testimony of the person requesting it - which makes them ripe for abuse.  Most judges will grant it because they think it's better to be safe than sorry. 


I completely understand why they are granted, especially ex-parte, what I don't understand is how they cannot have a fair hearing with evidence, witnesses and the like.  Like the article mentioned below, even a murderer, rapist, scum of the earth get fair trials, basic constitutional rights before they are proven GUILTY and THEN their rights are taken away.
#22
Any one ever heard of getting a civil rights lawyer based on having rights taken away by a false PPO?  The hearing went on with not one request of validity of the accusations and the PPO was ordered to stay in place.  Now, the burden of proof lies on the petitioner and in this case the respondent has ample proof to counter the accusations.  Have already been in front of the judge on an appeal because of a missed first hearing (no letter was received with the original date.)  Do we wait to hire a lawyer until the PPO is up for review in February?   We would like to expose how PPOs and ROs are used as a tool during custody issues between parents.
#23
http://courts.michigan.gov/scao/resources/publications/manuals/focb/cp_investigationmnl.pdf

If that doesn't work, I typed in Michigan's 12 custody factors in my search engine.  Now, again this is Michigan, but I think what is in the criteria is probably pretty standard around the board.  I guess using it as an outline for yourself wouldn't hurt.  Good luck.
#24
Does your family court website have a list of criteria when determining custody?  At ours we have the 12 custody factors that they basically go down the list and choose a parent that either "wins" the point or it is equal.  After all 12 have gone through, the parent who "won" the most factors is generally awarded custody.  The factors in our state include the capacity to care for the child's medical, schooling, etc.  It also has the "moral fiber" as one and so on.  Some are considered ties such as they both have love, affection and emotional ties to the children.  My list shows the factors and explains them.  I would go through each factor and write down how you personify it with your child.
#25
Visitation Issues / Re: First visitation
Nov 09, 2009, 01:25:00 PM
In my opinion, especially with seeing the children with their dads, the little one would be excited.  Like "I DO have a daddy"  but probably shy and nervous too.  I think if the dad expects an excellent father/daughter relationship right off the bat, he is shooting a bit high.  Because he will still be a stranger to her.  Maybe the first few visitations should be supervised with you there as like an introduction, do you and him get along well enough to be near eachother for a couple of hours while they play and get to know eachother?  Then maybe go from there.
#26
Father's Issues / Re: PPO stands, no proof given
Nov 06, 2009, 03:49:04 PM
no it is the same as before the PPO, the phone calls are hard to interperate because he isnt allowed to call her but he can leave voicemail for the kids.  that hasnt been a problem yet
#27
Father's Issues / PPO stands, no proof given
Nov 06, 2009, 07:49:28 AM
Well, things did not go in our favor today.  The PPO stands but slightly modified, he has to stay 75 feet away from her but if they are at a school function or something, if he is there first, she cannot approach him to violate the order. 

I thought the judge was going to ask her to prove why she is in fear for her life?  I thought if DH said there were numerous untruths in the affidavit, that the judge would turn to her and ask her to prove why and what he has actually done.  He did none of this, the actual PPO was not looked over or points on it were never spoken about.  They just rushed them through it and he left.

DH is now planning on getting a lawyer for when the PPO expires in February.  We are worried she will make it permanent, and since she didn't even have to say anything , will they make her prove the things she said he has done?  She doesn't have incident reports, charges against him, nothing, and in the previous 14 years before she lost in court, there was never a domestic disturbance or accusation.  (Except when she hit him twice and he just left instead of calling the police).  Basically, I thought for the order to stand she had the burden of proof and just her saying whatever she wants wouldn't be enough for a final decision.
#28
Child Support Issues / Re: Wrongful Arrears
Nov 04, 2009, 02:32:46 PM
where we live payments made directly to the receiver and not through the Friend of the Court do not count, maybe that is where the bill gets high.  Like if you handed her $100 every week even with a receipt, they don't count it.
#29
where we are we can file for the fee for the motions to be waived.  for example, we were going to file for a change in visitation and it was $100.  We had a paper to fill out and the judge looks it over and can waive the fee, which he did in our case.  We also have a legal aid place in the court house, cant do much but can point you in the right direction.  Ask if there are any fees waived due to financial hardship or something like that.
#30
Second Families / Re: adoption
Nov 02, 2009, 12:59:42 PM
 "but my children deserve a stable home without all the garbage that goes on. I constantly worry when their with him, not cuz I'm over protective either. The things I hear when my son and daughter come back from their BD visit is ridiculous. "


I understand this, we should of called protective services on the BM in the past but didn't, and we go through watching the kids' lives get all twisted because of BM's horrible decisions, but unfortunately in our case its harder to prove a mother unfit.  I have to accept my role as step-mother, parent the best I can to my two step-sons and know that we have the stable two-parent home and they appreciate that, no matter what is going on with BM.  It may be hard to see and hear, but sometimes that is how life goes.  I would adopt my sons in a heartbeat ( I am also adopted).  But it will never happen, they have a mother, maybe an unstable, selfish, immature mother, but she is their mother, the end.