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Messages - Haleymn

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1
Minnesota State Forum / Games he plays ;o)
« on: Nov 16, 2005, 01:12:37 PM »
Hi, even though I guess I am not new here, I did post some stuff way back awhile ago.

I sure wish this MN site would get up and moving, thanks to everyone from MN that does use it and keeps it somewhat active! I just can't believe that only like 10 people in MN need help or want to vent or share!! LOL

I just have to share this..too funny.
Well finally I was able to get NCP on having a real job, on the books!
This has taken me over 3 years and he is over $10,600 in arrears for 2 kids.
Anyway he started to work as a salesman door to door selling water treatment water softeners. He asked me if I wanted him to test my water!!
I almost fell to the floor, I couldn't believe he was telling me about a legit job!!
So I asked him about what it is that he does and who the company is.
He told me...when he left I went to the computer did a quick search, got the address, phone number, fax number and within 2 days my CW was able to get income witholding on his checks.
He asked me if I was getting that moeny and I told him yes and Thank you!
Now after just a month of getting my monthly CS payment, he is ready to quit the job...aacckkk And I haven't recieved any money again for 2 weeks. I think he figured out it is not the get rich scheme he was told it could be...working on commission.
I realize that working door to door can't be fun, but I work two jobs in the winter to get by.
So anyway people who need to find where the NCP works, get a little info and get on the internet and search it out!!

3
Dear Socrateaser / RE: Not a question, just an update
« on: Nov 17, 2005, 12:23:02 AM »
I don't even know you, but I am so happy for you!! Congratulations ;o)

4
Visitation Issues / RE: Willfully wants to increase visitation?
« on: Nov 17, 2005, 12:18:34 AM »

>
>Who is Socrateaser? I am new here and don't know who or what
>that is?

Forget it I found Socratease!! Thanks!!

5
Visitation Issues / RE: Willfully wants to increase visitation?
« on: Nov 17, 2005, 12:13:10 AM »
Yes we live in the same school district and finally this is the first year that the kids can catch a bus to and from his girlfriends house. She also has a boy the same age and in the same grade as our Daughter.

I know, isn't it odd that some parents are not allowed to see their kids more. And I have one that is almost the opposite and seems quite content to only see them 4 days a month!!

CS income was figured out of a supposed income that he would only be able to make in the future. The records and income statements at the time of the seperation for him were for $15.00-$22.00 an hour. But since he had a full year in which to set up a different job history, the judge allowed a $10.00 pr hour income!! This was set and no proof of this has ever been documented...anyway because of his income level compared to mine when figuring out Day care (when I really could have used it) my income was greater then his supposed income, so he was awared that paying Child Care for him would be substantially unfair!
On the way out of the court house he said under his breath, Hah, got you B****!!! and he laughed!
I went from being a stay at home mother to 4 kids, to the major bread winner and full time worker so that I would have a home for us!
He also sold our house of 11 years so he was able to live off of that money for that year and didn't need to show an income. My name was not on the title. we live in Minnesota. Laywer told me, that for me to want back any of the profit from the sale of that house, would be like me asking a landlord to get back 1/2 my rent for the last 11 years!!
I still am not sure that was really the right advice...too late now anyhow!
That made me cry as I had proof that I had made substanticial payments towards it also. ($ from my parents to help us out)

I am not afraid of him going for joint or full custody of the children. He can't even come close to finding me an unfit mother...I am not sure I fully understand what full custody means...what are the benefits or disadvantages?????
I am the only one that has a home that is owned by a parent of these kids. He has been kicked out of his girlfriends house frequently when they fight about the kids being there!
My one hope would be is that this would end that bad relationship and he would need to get a home of his own where the kids could be themselfs...Girlfriend is not mean to the kids, she takes it out on him!!?
But the kids do witness some of it. They are free to come home anytime they want from visiting there, all they need to do is a phone call and I am less then 10 minutes away if I speed and I have!!

WE were never married, I don'tknow if that matters or not. He signed the recognition of parentage in the Hosp. when they were both born. And yes they are his...I don't need to go on Maury and test 10 guys!! LOL I am smilin when I am writing this,,,I am not being anywhere near a smart A** ;o)

Who is Socrateaser? I am new here and don't know who or what that is?
Anyway sorry for getting so long with this...and unfortunately I know I can't make him do this...maybe pleading like he is doing me a favor and being my savior will bring him around!

6
Visitation Issues / Willfully wants to increase visitation?
« on: Nov 16, 2005, 04:09:18 PM »
I am looking to see if anyone has a good idea to get visitation increased for the NCP.
I was never married, so no divorce, no visitation schedule set.
I the only thing that there is on record is every other weekend starting Friday after school and ending Sunday evening at 6:00pm.

This was set up through a OFP that I got because he needed to get control of his temper at that time in life.

He can be, and is most of the times a really good father!!
But if I ask him to take the kids, in advance on a given day or night to help me out. Working out of town and I won't get home until 7-8pm.
At times I have asked him to pick them up and take them to practice or to a DR. appt.

He has very flexable hours with his job as he is self-employee. I am not self employeed I just have a very understanding boss.

But if I ask him for this "Favor" he more often then not, will tell me it is not his weekend!!

We are normally flexable about the weekends, we don't fight or anything. I would like to at times because of the frustration level at being told It's not my weekend!"

I am thinking about just asking him to please consider taking the 2, who are almost 13 & 12 yrs old. for a 3-4 day weekend a month...or more if he would like.

I seriously am very easy to get along with and I only want what the kids want. They do want to spend more time with him, he even tells them No when they call to see if he can pick them up for a few hours!!

Anyway should I just ask him and get the response I feel I will get? If he doesn't want that, should I tell him then that my only recourse will be to go to court and ask for a better visitation arrangement?

What do you do, when the father doesn't want the kids more then 4 days a month?

Wow...he just called and I asked him about this. He agreed but said he needed to ask his girlfriend since it is her house they live in!!
She interfers a lot with him and the kids. I told him I need this visitation to start within the month, and if he comes back and tells me that she says no, they can not come to stay at her house, I will take it to court!

OK so now the question is, which court? Family Court? Who does a person go to, to get additional visitation? I realize that NO one can make him pick up the kids, but I think he would listen to a judge if he, told him to pick them up. Because the past shows that the father did listen to the Judge when he told him to for the weekend visitations....

The father is suppose to pay CS of $365.00 a month which he mainly chooses not to pay. So it is not like he has an overwhelming burden placed on him. Or an unfair arrangement like what happens so often.

As I said he does work, it is just for cash! However I did get money last month from a different job.

Any ideas?

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