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I don't understand her family.  Her mother has taught school for years, and her father owns his own business.  He does contract work for the county doing weed abatement.  Her father did me a couple of favors when we lived up there before, and her mom would bring groceries when Jessica was living with me.  I just don't get why they keep dragging her down.

I'll add the fire dept. to my call list.  I hope I can get to the bottom of this.

I could do this because my child was in the car, couldn't I?  If a bottle of perfume broke, then my kid would also smell to high heaven.  I'm just thinking about possible problems with confidentiality laws.  No one at Loma Linda mentioned anything to me about this.

I have the contact info for Mercy Air, because they sent me a bill for over 7k :/  I think it was the Fire Department that cut them out of the truck, so I could ask them for their logs.  I need to write this down.  I'm computerless up there.

I talked to my older daughter last night, and Jessica is already in Nevada.  When her parents said they would take care of her bills for her, they drained her savings account.  I guess the kid doesn't realize that her house is going to end up in foreclosure.  If she tries to obtain a driver's license under false pretenses, she's going to be in a world of hurt.  

Thank you so much for your input.  I'm going to do some phone calls tomorrow.  I was supposed to be back up there yesterday, but I'm battling an ant invasion, plus trying to find where the kids buried their clothes.  Their bedrooms are demoralizing.  Oh yeah, still need to pack up the canned goods. At least I got the important phone calls and errands done.  

PS:  Did I mention that Jessica's father told her not to file for disability?  She's a plumber.  How do you do that with a cracked pelvis, fractured elbow, and apparently a head injury that is still preventing her eyes to focus?  My little one was damn lucky.

Thank you again!

Actually they were airlifted to two different trauma centers.  The traffic was tied up through the Cajon Pass, so they couldn't use an ambulance.  There should still be a report like you mentioned.  I will pass this info on to her.  Thank you!

I know you can't fight City Hall, so maybe this is just a rant.

Some of you might remember that I mentioned my youngest daughter being in an accident on August 13th.  Well the police report is finally done.  I'm back down here to do some packing, so my daughter read a portion of the police report to me over the phone, until I told her to stop.  

They're blaming the whole thing on the driver of the truck my girl was in!  When my daughter (the almost 22 yr old) got to the part where the driver reeked of alcohol, I told her to stop.  On the night of the accident, Jessica went out to dinner with my daughter's fiance's brother.  They had a margarita with dinner.  Then they stayed at my daughter's place for several hours until he took his daughter back to his ex gf's.  At that point, Jessica and my youngest decided to spend the night at her house.  No alcohol was consumed at my daughter's house.  3 adults will testify to that.  It is the truth.

I received a call from a witness at the accident scene telling me the little one was in an accident.  His phone cut out, but not before I heard my girl howling in the backround.  I called my daughter to get out there and see what was going on.  Okay, my daughter called Jessica's parents at the scene, and told them what happened.  Her father called back the next day and and said that they took a blood sample at the scene and she tested positive for alcohol.  One drink, 4 hours before, and it still registers?  Well okay.  He also said, this was all told to my daughter btw, that he knew a lot of people and would pull some strings.

Yeah, that asshole pulled some strings alright.  I finally spoke to him last night.  He's telling me that he examined the skid marks and he could tell right away that it was Jessica's fault.  My little one's stubborn, unchanging memory of the events is faulty.  Then he tells me that she's moving to Nevada or Arizona to get a license.  Earth to Larry, that ain't gonna happen and you know it.

Just to help anyone reading this make sense of what I'm getting at, let me tell you some things about Jessica's parents.  Apparently Jessica was not a wanted child.  She was treated pretty badly.  A couple of things came back to me while I was on the phone with her father.  One was the time that Jessica's brother beat her up.  I think he dragged her by her hair over the carpet, and she had to have stitches in her lips.  Her mother lied about what happened to a police officer in the emergency room.  Jessica's lips were so swollen, she couldn't talk.  Mom's excuse was that it might affect her employment as a teacher.  I remember when Jessica came over the next day and told me what happened.  Even better, her father and brother at a later date pushed her buttons until her redheaded temper shot through the roof.  They then restrained her and had her admitted to the county psych ward for a 3 day vacation.  That's when she moved in with me.

She graduated a year ahead of schedule with honors.  She is a plumber and bought a tiny house at age 20.  When she lived with me, she not only helped my son with his homework, but also taught my youngest to read.  I didn't get off work until 9pm, which was their bedtime.  She even remodeled the bathroom.  Her parents financed both her brother and sister's college tuition, but they told Jessica to go pound sand.  There are a million other charming episodes, but these I remember.  That poor kid has been trying to prove herself to her parents for as long as I've known her, and all they do is kick her to the curb.

Back to the police report.  Reeking of alcohol?  Try a broken bottle of Victoria's Secret perfume that was in the cab of the truck.  Peeeeeuuuu! What is the stabilizing ingredient in perfume?  ALCOHOL!  BAC?  There wasn't one on the report!!!  There is not one damn thing about Jessica having a drop of alcohol in her blood stream.  It took almost a whole month to come up with this fairytale?  F.U. Larry.  

Is there anything we can do?  Emergency personnel are not going to remember smelling perfume in a multi-car collision.  The emergency rooms that they went to are jam packed with people 24/7.  They won't remember.

Some of you might be saying that I shouldn't care about this.  Well think about this:  We are staying with my daughter until we can find affordable housing.  My little one left her sister's house with Jessica.  The police report is a crock of shit, but an official report nonetheless.  What happens if my ex and Satan's little helper get their hands on this?

Yep, it turned into a rant.  Thank you for reading this, and if you have any suggestions, I'm all ears.  

That's a tough break.  It sounds like you have a plan, though.  Good luck Kitty!

From my perspective, I have so many things to say about this topic.  Back when the adult aged girls were little, I didn't know about child support.  I did know what happened when you went on welfare and public housing.  I chose the devil I knew.  My father wanted to help me, but my mother, God rest her soul, was obsessively religious.  Her advice was to pray harder when my head dented the wall studs.  She actually helped sabotage our escape in 1999.  We didn't know she had Alzheimer's.

I would give anything in this world to be well enough to take those child support payments and alimony, and shove them them down his throat.  Unfortunately, right now I need the money.

The answer to  your question is hell no.  My son will turn 17 on the 24th of September.  My little one has just turned 10.  As a matter of fact, my girl broke her leg and finger in a car wreck on 8/13.  This came several days after the last bullshit CPS visit.  Okay.  It is witnessed and admissible in court that the child wanders through the house by herself, because everyone locks themselves in their rooms at her father's house.  Very frequently they stay at 4 star hotels.  So much for fishing, hiking, or camping....of course she can't do that for awhile.

I have decided that I'm going to take my turn at screwing up visitation.  This child will not leave the premises until she is physically able to fend for herself.  She cannot tackle a full flight of stairs, nor can she get in and out of bed by herself.  She has steel rods implanted in her right thigh bone (femur), and a cast on her right hand.  Daddy can stop by.  Actually after what he and his little helper have done, they can eat Alpo and bark at the moon.

You've got quite a mess on your hands.

First of all, when you are a parent, you don't have a separate adult life.  That is a fairy tale.   You dictate how you will run your life and care for your child, not your current husband.  I'm sorry, but you really stepped in it by posting pics of yourself in compromising positions on the internet.  

I'm trying very hard not to be judgemental here, but let me clue you in on something.  If your current husband was there when the pictures were taken, did he encourage the episode in the first place?  If so, you need to tell him to take a hike.  The evaluator, the judge, and everyone else sees this as bad judgement on your part.  If you were coerced into posing for the pics, that is spousal abuse.  Get out now.  Like I said, you have no right to a separate "adult" life when you are a parent.

Based on how you described the visits to your mother, I'm not sure how the evaluator could possibly make a statement like that.  Was there something else involved?  Btw, you have my condolences on the loss of your mom.

I have a question.  If your son's father did not want the child, why has he changed his mind now?  Adultery during marriage doesn't seem to have the impact that it should in a divorce hearing.  If your ex continues to have serial lovers, it could be brought up, but so can your conduct.

You sound young.  For what it's worth, I'd like to offer you some advice.  Just because MTV says it's cool, doesn't make it  good.  Right now you're faced with the consequences of the choices you've made.  I can't guarantee that making different choices will help you in the long run with your particular situation, but in general it will build a better you.

Good luck.



If you can't put your child first, then you should let someone else have custody of him.

I'm sending my kids up after my little girl's doctor appointment at Loma Linda Wednesday.  She and her big sister's best friend were in that car wreck on Hwy 18 on 8/13.  

I have to say that I am having a very big problem reading your post.  It's a good idea to separate the the post into paragraphs.  Every four lines, or so, just hit the "enter" key.

I'm going to get back to you tomorrow about a few things that you mentioned.  I'm pretty tired right now, however I do want to address some issues you've raised.

Can that be proven?  Did she really purchase the gun 3 days before the murder?

She planned this, and unless the DA rides the short bus, this woman is going to the chair.  Reread what you typed : "After hearing the five shots, mom then called the police".

Okay.  She just sat there while her child waltzed out of the house with a gun (5 shot=9MM?)?  She didn't run after him and prevent him from doing this?

Prayers for the family.

I cannot believe a 10 year old child could do this to anyone, much less his parent.

He then returned to the house where the mother took the weapon from him and called 911.

Well I've sat here for quite a while, and still can't come up with a response to that...Oh yes I can, but I'm already juggling hand grenades.