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Messages - Kitty C.

Pages: 1 23 4 ... 250
11
Father's Issues / Re: birth certificate in MD
« on: Apr 29, 2013, 10:14:13 pm »
Don't call....go there personally.  I used to do birth certificates for a major hospital in Sacramento, CA and had to go to the Vital Statistics office at least once a month.   Taking your court order and showing it to them in person would go a lot further than just talking to them on the phone.  JMO, of course....

12
General Issues / Re: Question about paying for braces
« on: Apr 23, 2013, 08:16:37 am »
Great points, ocean!

13
General Issues / Re: Question about paying for braces
« on: Apr 22, 2013, 08:31:12 am »
I certainly agree with MB about less expensive alternatives...you could state in your letter that if she decides on the more expensive kind, you will only be willing to pay for 50% of the traditional kind.  But since it's impossible to lose traditional braces (as opposed to the 'Invisaligns'), I would inform her that you will only be paying this ONCE....that if the Invisaligns are lost or broken, you will not be responsible for new ones to replace.  Since there's such a big difference between the two options, IMO I don't think you should even imply to BM that you'd be okay paying for a replacement, let alone the additional original cost above what reg. braces cost.  But that's JMO....

On another note, if you live anywhere near a dental college, you might be able to find a cheaper alternative there.  I work at a dental school and both DS and SS had their braces here....for less than half of what it would cost with a private dentist.

14
Chit Chat / Re: Magic Coating
« on: Feb 08, 2013, 03:53:54 pm »
WOW!!!!  That is SO cool!   :o

15
Child Support Issues / Re: 2 State Child Support Issues
« on: Jan 23, 2013, 09:26:06 am »
Ditto!   :D

16
Custody Issues / Re: Desperately needing advice...
« on: Jan 23, 2013, 09:23:03 am »
Does the child have a passport?  If not, do NOT sign for one.  A child's passport application requires signatures from both parents.  If she hints at getting the child a passport, contact the state dept. to make sure his name is flagged, just in case she tries to forge your name anyway.
 
What you have going for you is that she is giving you a great heads-up and that your child is a US citizen.  Use it to your advantage and I also agree with Davy's suggestion, as well.  She's thretening to take him out of the country....you have to make sure she doesn't get the chance.

17
Father's Issues / Re: "raised Catholic"
« on: Jan 08, 2013, 11:18:11 am »
Sorry, MB!  That was my fault!  I was answering from work and apparently was too distracted to read your original post accurately. Silly me!   :D

18
Father's Issues / Re: "raised Catholic"
« on: Jan 07, 2013, 02:51:33 pm »
Didn't think that was you, MB!  Unless there's something you haven't been telling us, LOL!
 
I would say cross your fingers that the judge takes into consideration how many hours the child has to ride in a vehicle.  If worse comes to worse, I'd be asking for compensation for mileage and gas....that's a lot of wera and tear on a vehicle.  I think the going rate with the IRS is 55 cents per mile, but I'm not sure....

19
I'll be honest with you....I do not envy your situation, having been through some of it myself.  All I can tell you is that if your gut instinct is telling you something, go with it and be persistent

20
Something smells fishy here..........by law, a psychiatrist canNOT prescribe a med (especially if it's a controlled substance) without a diagnosis.  He HAD to code the appt. with a diagnosis in order to submit it to insurance.  And I'm not too sure I would trust this doc if that's what he's telling you.
 
I can see the writing on the wall with your SS, as I had similar (tho not as severe) issues with DS.  First with schooling.  I'm not sure how the school can provide 'additional help' for a student without getting a formal diagnosis and doing an IEP (individualized education plan).  If he gets a diagnosis that warrants an IEP (sometimes it depends on the diagnosis as to what kind of help they are entitled to), then much more help should be available to him, because the school would be able to get more money from the state to cover it.  Without it, all they can give him is cursory help, which I seriously doubt would work in his situation.
 
He needs to be seen by a pediatric psychologist, one who specializes in childhood behavior and is properly trained and educated in how to deal with them.  A general psychiatrist will not have this specialized training.  Now, psychologists cannot prescribe meds, but they CAN make a med recommendation, which can be given to the primary care provider to write.  We did this for 10 years with DS and it worked perfectly.  Plus, I had the added benefit of knowing that any changes to his meds were based on recommendations of a specialist, not a family doc who was guessing.
 
At one point, DS's psychologist recommended residential treatment.  Forewarning:  it is INCREDIBLY expensive unless you can some way miraculously get it covered by insurance or get a student loan for it.  I sent DS to a wilderness therapy treatment program for 2 months in Oregon....at the cost of $25,000 only to find out that it wasn't the kind of treatment he needed.  Shortly after that, he got in trouble with the law, was evaluated in juvenile detention as needing residential treatment (Duh!), and sent to a facility until his 18th birthday (which was only for 6 months, tho he needed a year).  I told his probation officer that if I had known what it would take to get him the help he needed, I would have told him to break the law a whole lot earlier....she didn't bat an eye because she knew I was telling the truth.
 
This kid is CRYING out for help.  He needs a thorough evaluation with a specialist and any recommendations made MUST be followed through with, or it will just be a waste of everyone's time.  If you need assistance in getting some recommendations done, ask for help, whether that be through the specialist he's seeing, the school (if they can provide it competantly), or the state.  It may also require requests to the court regarding legal custody...if the BM refuses to follow any recommendations, enlist the help of whatever specialist making the recommendation to impress on the court that this child will be in big trouble if the recommendations are not followed and the only hope of that happening is if the father has complete legal custody and possible physical, too.
 
I mentioned writing on the wall....not to be a 'doomsdayer', but if this child doesn't get some intense help really soon, he may be lost for good.  He's only hit the tip of the iceberg and I would venture to say that there might be other illegal activity going on that you don't know about...he just hasn't been caught yet.  And you don't have much time, either.  I wish you the best, but I see this as a situation where the BM has done a really great job of f***ing up a child.  You have more time with the younger one, but not by much.....but you may have to do the same thing with him, too.

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