Child Support, how can it be lowered by the CP?

[spirit]

I realize that there has to be a good reason for a Judge to allow CS lowered but what reasons can be used?  My ex isn't the father of a child that I had resulting from an affair and he is required to pay for him.   I want to do what is right by my ex but with the laws the way they are, we would have to go to court and pay a lot of money to get this done.  Isn't there an easier way?

[jilly]

In the eyes of the law your ex is the father because (I am assuming) you were married when the child was conceived.

Your ex will need to establish paternity, which means a paternity test.  If the test comes back that he's not the father then you're going to have to come up with baby daddy's name so CSE can go after the right guy.

Course in the family court system there's no guarantee the court will let your ex off the hook for CS.

How old is the child?  In what State do you live?

I'd also post this on the board for Dear Socrateaser.  Be sure to read the posting guidelines before you post or he won't answer.

[spirit]

I don't want the real father to know about this child.  Married, divorced and then remarried then divorce again.  He knew he wasn't the father when we married.  Yes, he was born while we were married the second time.  He is on the BC.  Ohio is the state.  

I can't even just ask for it to be lowered?  I don't want the money from him, I don't want the real father to know the truth.  The child is 13.  They have a special bond and my ex doesn't want the child to know the truth and neither do I.  He wants to continue supporting him but I am getting way too much money for a child that isn't his.  Does everything have to go through the court system?

[cinb85]

why don't you just give him some of the money back each week?
I honestly don't think that the courts will lower the CS.  His name is on the BC, so in the courts eyes he is the father.  

Let him pay the full amount each week, but you can just give him some back.  Sounds to me like you have a good enough relationship to be able to do that.

[MafiaMom]

is one party goes to the courthouse and picks up a form from them. It's to change the child support amount. He/she fills it out, and the other party signs also. Both copies are returned to the court, and it's all done. It's never been an issue. It can work with INCREASES and with DECREASES as well. As long as both parties agree to it, no court date needs to be set.

Call your clerk of court. YOU, as the cp. Find out how to go about modifying a support order to an amount you BOTH AGREE ON. Those are the key words. It may just be a matter of mailing them a piece of paper.

HOWEVER...if you are on state aid, then there is no way to modify. The state will have to do that instead, and they won't.

[cinb85]

nm

[Ref]

BM filed for increase. Judge ordered that they work it out between themselves. 4 months and 100000 arguements later, they agreed (kinda) on an amount filed a stipulation and the judge signed it and move it along. Basically the same thing.

If you already agree, the hard part is over. (IMO)\

Ref

[catherine]

is to cash the CS check and give the money back to him.  Or deposit it into a joint account and he can grab the money out of it.

[sherrie ohio]

If you get state help,it wont be that easy!!!!

[MafiaMom]

My ex used to increase his voluntarily every now and again. He'd go to the courthouse, pick up a form, write in the new amount, sign it, take it to his ex to sign, and mail it in. It works the same way for a decrease. As long as BOTH PARTIES agree, there isn't any problem, and doesn't need to be brought in front of a judge. At least...HERE in Michigan.

However, if the cp is on welfare or any other form of state aid, it CAN'T be done. then the cp has nothing to do with it. It's the ncp vs. the STATE.

[spirit]

Since you are from Ohio, do you know if this is the situation here, just fill out a form?

[MafiaMom]

the clerk of court is probably your best bet. I tried to google for you, but since I don't know your county, I got a bunch of websites that just gave EXAMPLES with Ohio being used as one or some...and on various issues.

A simple phone call to the clerk of court will help. And you may be able to download the forms online. Here in michigan they've implemented a filing fee for pro se issues, so be sure to ask about that, too.

[sherrie ohio]

Alot depends on if you receive state aid.If you do the state isn't going to want the amount decreased.Because the more he pays the less they have to give you.Also how old the child is and if the real father wants to step up to the plate,and pay.Most of my time dealing with c-support  has been as a Step-parent.And the BM gets state aid and theres no way they would alow the decrease in support if they have to make up the differance.I'm not forshure what the court would say if your not on state aid.Post your question on the state forum on this site.There may be someone on there that may have better info. Good luck.

[spirit]

nm

[marnbuk]

I would just agree on an amount with the NCP and give back the extra every month without going through the courts. You never know what will come up when you start getting the courts involved. Or if the NCP is providing the medical insurance mail the extra in on the premiums so he isnt covering all of the support. Put the extra in a savings account for graduation, first car, college, etc. That would still help both parents. I am sure he will not be opposed to either one. Be carefull with going to court in my state they only like to modify child support every three years. If you petition to lower it and something happens that you need the extra support (unexpected illness,injury,loss of job,etc.) then you have to go back to the courts and NCP may not be so agreeable to increase support then you have the expense of modification. Anything you can agree on outside of court is in your best interest.