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Author Topic: MEETING WITH GAL  (Read 10755 times)

c_alexander

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Still don't understand
« Reply #10 on: Feb 07, 2005, 02:03:17 PM »
I am still not getting why GAL is getting involved. Is she gay and is so what does that have to do with custody of your children. It should have absolutely NO bearing whatsoever...at least no legally. If it does then it breaks the very civil rights laws that organizations like this GAL fought to create in the first place.
I don't know the in's and outs of the situation, so if I  am being ignorant by suggesting this then please forgive me. Have you considered putting a 50-50 custody deal on the table? Let everyone involed know that you are MORE concerned with the childrens well being and happiness then anything else and that a 50-50 plan would take the children out of the middle. This might keep them from having to pick sides. It also might mke your ex a bit less aggressive. You could opt that witht he 50-50 custody no childsupport be paid, but rather each parent would be responsible for supporting the kids when they had their parenting time. Also you could alternate or share the tax exemptions. If you have two kids, you each get one, or one person get them one year, the other gets them the next.
I might be an idiot, but I believe that the 50-50 custody is the way to go. We as fathers have fought so hard to make things fair in this country that it is easy to want to more then our fair share to help make up for the time we have lost.  If we as fathers try to take custody away from the mothers without justification then we are no better then they are. Recently a lawyer told me that we could very well get me custody of my daughter and get her back to Indiana and as much as I wanted to say yes, I told him no because if I did that then i was as bad, if not worse then my ex wife.

I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you that things work out in this situation for the best man. Good luck

The ribbon Guy
Chris


jojobear

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RE: Still don't understand
« Reply #11 on: Feb 07, 2005, 02:19:27 PM »
no one is gay....or atleast no one in this circumstance...lol  The GAL is involved because the BM of my boys wants custody.  She stated that the boys want to live with her.  So, the court ordered a GAL to speak with the boys.  To be their voice.  I believe it is a very good thing.  That way some of the pressure is taken off of them.  They are 12 and 11.  Too young too make these types of decisions as they can easily be swayed to either side, depending on the mood for the day and how the day went.  I don't know if 50/50 is even an option. We are 100 miles apart from BM.
Thank you for your thoughts and prayers.

c_alexander

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RE: Still don't understand
« Reply #12 on: Feb 07, 2005, 08:53:32 PM »
Here in IN at 12 a child can choose where they live. I jsut don't understand why a court would order the GAL to talk to your kids. Are they planning to give them make overs or something? haha sorry a little humor sometimes can help.

As for the 50-50 deal, perhaps if it were mentions to the other party that distance could be bridged. At least if the offer was made it could show you are willing ot try to work things out. A court might even look disfavorably upon the ex if she was not willing to try to move closer to make that a possibility. Could show the court that she does not have the best intersts of the kids at heart. Could be worth a shot.

Whatever happens try to keep your children in mind. Whatever they decide they want do your best, no matter how much you might think that it is the wrong thing to do, support them. It will mean a lot to them and they will thank you for it.

In my life I have screwed up a heck of a lot. Made some pretty bad choices and Iam paying the price for some of those now, but my parents regardless of whether or not they agreed with me always supported me. Looking back now I can only imagine how difficult some of my decisions where for them but still they supported me. I have tried very hard to do this for my own daughter, and it is paying off. I only get to see my daughter 14% of the year, but I have 50% of her love. Our relationship in many ways is stronger then that she shares with her mom because of the things I have done for her...like putting her first. Something my ex wife and many parents often forget to do.

Hang in there and I'll keep rooting for ya. By the way I want to see the makeover before and after pictures when GAL gets down with your kids ok? haha

Sincerely,
Chris Alexander
the Ribbon Guy

Hawkeye

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RE: Still don't understand
« Reply #13 on: Feb 09, 2005, 02:00:11 AM »
GAL's are a total joke....

Do they have experience with children.... nope

Do they have children.. nope

informed... nope


Granny

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RE: Still don't understand
« Reply #14 on: Feb 15, 2005, 01:55:13 AM »
Our experience with a GAL is don't trust them.  Don't give them anymore than they ask for.  Be open in answering questions, but never, ever trust.

We had one who had been touted as good and ended up becoming our worst nightmare.  His name is Michael R. Schoonover (Advocates Investigations in Everett, WA) in Snohomish County, WA.  I would suggest if anyone has him to get him off your cases asap.  THe man lies, cheats, and will do whatever he can to get his way.  He is rude, vindictive, and is also a former deadbeat dad himself.  Additionally, he overcharges for services he doesn't deliver.  He's one evil man who does not act in the best interests of children.

Be careful!



>GAL's are a total joke....
>
>Do they have experience with children.... nope
>
>Do they have children.. nope
>
>informed... nope
>
>


MYSONSDAD

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Could not agree more!!!!
« Reply #15 on: Feb 15, 2005, 04:34:35 PM »
I had a very, so called "qualified" Evaluator. Every word was twisted. And overcharged. Did little to see the facts, even when slapped in the face with them. All a game about money.

"Children learn what they live"

jojobear

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RE: Could not agree more!!!!
« Reply #16 on: Feb 15, 2005, 07:52:55 PM »
My boys had their second visit with the GAL today.  She told the oldest that she had reached her decision and then told him...but told him not to tell his parents.   THIS BURNS ME UP!  What the hec kind of games is that?  Does she not know that...that is emotional abuse for a child to have to keep something in without telling anyone.  Isn't that fostering a non-productive "secretive" relationship between parent/child?  This is crazy!  No better then when their BM told them that she had filled out the papers to get custody of them...but not to tell me because I would hate them.  The very next day my 12 year old had fever blisters from his nerves and started having bowel movements in his pants.  Now who the hec has the best interest of the children in mind?  Surely not anyone I have mentioned so far in this post.  We got a call from our attorney a few minutes ago.  He said that he had talked to the GAL and she says that the boys have a strong desire to move with their BM.  But that is not enough for her to get custody.  But from what I have been reading on here and on other websites.....it might just be.  The boys are 12 & 11.  And we have found out rather quickly that they can be bought...cause BM sure has done a fine job of it recently.
I'm just at my wits end.  We have our first court date on Thursday.
I'll keep everyone posted.

gipsy

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told ya !
« Reply #17 on: Feb 16, 2005, 12:16:55 PM »
Told Ya to watch out re read My post , Just because they are a GAL for the court , in no way makes them a professional , The problem Is If this does not come out  In your favor there will be very little that you can do ,

MYSONSDAD

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This could be considered unethical...
« Reply #18 on: Feb 16, 2005, 12:49:02 PM »
It should not be her place to tell the kids. I think it is unethical.

I ended up filing a complaint with the State Board on the person I got stuck with...

gipsy

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RE: This could be considered unethical...
« Reply #19 on: Feb 16, 2005, 07:39:38 PM »
there is numerous complaints about the GAL I Had, Her name Is Suzanne Dirks , She works out of Pierce county washington , It should be documented that there are a number of people against her in this area , Unfortunatley the presideing judge for the GAL system here doesn't seem to care , The woman Is a disgrace to Guardian ad Litem's And She literally fabricated information in My case

 

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