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Author Topic: transportation and visitation  (Read 3647 times)

AAP2388

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transportation and visitation
« on: Dec 04, 2011, 01:11:01 PM »
My court order states that my sons father is supposed to do all transporting during visitation, because he is the one who moved. Now my sons father is trying to get me to do the drop offs or he refuses to come see our son. I cannot transport due to the fact I cannot drive. My doctor has stated that I cannot drive due to my high anxiety. How can I handle this issue? Advice needed.


ocean

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Re: transportation and visitation
« Reply #1 on: Dec 04, 2011, 02:06:21 PM »
Why won't he come? What is his reason for not coming anymore? If he does not come to get child then he skips that visit.

AAP2388

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Re: transportation and visitation
« Reply #2 on: Dec 04, 2011, 02:19:39 PM »
Why won't he come? What is his reason for not coming anymore? If he does not come to get child then he skips that visit.

He won't come because he doesn't want to drive the 45 minutes to come get our son. I have even offered that if he cannot make it on the scheduled day that he can come on another day if it works better for his schedule, and he says no. He knew before he moved that I didn't drive, and I told him upfront that he would have to transport if he moved, the judge also told him the same thing.

shellcode

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Re: transportation and visitation
« Reply #3 on: Dec 04, 2011, 02:39:02 PM »
he does not come, his lost than,if he really wanted to see him,he get his ass up and get him,he does not need no more explanation from u.

ocean

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Re: transportation and visitation
« Reply #4 on: Dec 04, 2011, 03:59:28 PM »
You can not force him to come get him. Maybe offer a long distance plan instead where he can have child longer on school vacations and more in the summer instead of every other weekend. It would be great if your child sees him more and if he fully capable of getting child then not sure what else you can do. If you have someone that is willing to meet at a half way point instead? Is there traffic on Friday nights when he has to come after work? Maybe he can just spend Fri or Sat in your area instead?
How about you ask him what he wants?? (beside you driving him because he knows you can not)


AAP2388

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Re: transportation and visitation
« Reply #5 on: Dec 04, 2011, 04:14:38 PM »
You can not force him to come get him. Maybe offer a long distance plan instead where he can have child longer on school vacations and more in the summer instead of every other weekend. It would be great if your child sees him more and if he fully capable of getting child then not sure what else you can do. If you have someone that is willing to meet at a half way point instead? Is there traffic on Friday nights when he has to come after work? Maybe he can just spend Fri or Sat in your area instead?
How about you ask him what he wants?? (beside you driving him because he knows you can not)

He doesn't want him on vacations or in the summer, because he goes  camping with his dad, I have questioned him why he doesn't want to take our son, and he says because he wants to enjoy his vacation. I have asked people if they will meet half way, and no one can do it, they are busy. He doesn't want to come to my area and stay because he wants to go back to his place and he cannot afford a hotel every weekend.

ocean

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Re: transportation and visitation
« Reply #6 on: Dec 04, 2011, 04:30:49 PM »
Well, then maybe see if he will do once a month on a long weekend from school?
Sounds like he really has some growing up to do. Email him back and forth for proof that you tried. If he still wont come, then email him to call you a week before a weekend he can do, and you will try your best to have child available. Keep the email going with school and activities schedule. Every now ant then you can send him a copy of report cards or whatever in a registered letter to keep him up to date and have proof. Keep texts or take pictures of the phone when he cancels or says no.
If he wont do anything, text him the Wed before his weekends and ask if he is coming that weekend. Then keep it. Start telling child that dad is working and he will not go there as ofter but loves him. You will let him know when he is coming.
Is it a money thing? Maybe offer him some gas money to help get son back and forth. Really not your issue but if it gets your son to see his dad?


AAP2388

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Re: transportation and visitation
« Reply #7 on: Dec 04, 2011, 05:28:25 PM »
Well, then maybe see if he will do once a month on a long weekend from school?
Sounds like he really has some growing up to do. Email him back and forth for proof that you tried. If he still wont come, then email him to call you a week before a weekend he can do, and you will try your best to have child available. Keep the email going with school and activities schedule. Every now ant then you can send him a copy of report cards or whatever in a registered letter to keep him up to date and have proof. Keep texts or take pictures of the phone when he cancels or says no.
If he wont do anything, text him the Wed before his weekends and ask if he is coming that weekend. Then keep it. Start telling child that dad is working and he will not go there as ofter but loves him. You will let him know when he is coming.
Is it a money thing? Maybe offer him some gas money to help get son back and forth. Really not your issue but if it gets your son to see his dad?

I send him school pictures and things like that, I call him and give him updates. He says he will try to come up but then he never does, he calls and says he would rather go out for the evening. So I do bend over backwards to try to get him to come. Honestly I cannot give him gas money, I really don't have the money to give him money for gas. And no money is not an issue for him, its pretty much he will try to come if nothing better pops up.

shellcode

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Re: transportation and visitation
« Reply #8 on: Dec 06, 2011, 07:26:44 PM »
that's crazy,he just don't want any part and make excuses,but keep him inform,in case he backfires u later.

 

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