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Author Topic: We have joint legal custody but....  (Read 3792 times)

mommy nurse

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We have joint legal custody but....
« on: Sep 03, 2012, 12:50:55 PM »
Here's my case.  We have joint legal custody, I have her the whole summer and he has her during school days while I get her every other weekend from Friday evening to Monday AM.  Now during our court hearing in April, he was able to lie a lot.  That time, we both didn't have lawyers.  So the judge favored him for not transferring our daughter who has mild autism to my area.  He babysits for a living, refuses to find a full time job, owes child support of $50,000 from other kids.  He has 6 kids from 6 different mothers.  He now then filed for child support, pending at this time, by which I hired a lawyer.  and lately, HE FILED FOR SSDI AND MEDI-CAL for our daughter.  My lawyer wrote him a letter that I will be forced to do judicial intervention but he never listened.  In his  mind, he does believe he has sole legal custody.  BTW, HE IS A SOCIOPATH. 

With what he applied for SSDI and medi-cal, lying about the other parent's existence(that's me), what are the consequences of his actions?  Anyone who has he same experience as mine?  When in comes to the benefits he applied for without my consent?  I do have a lawyer but I wanna hear other's experiences. 

THANK U for all your help folks!!


ocean

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Re: We have joint legal custody but....
« Reply #1 on: Sep 03, 2012, 03:27:29 PM »
If he is primary parent during the school year then usually he would get child support from you. Most states go by YOUR income only and really does not matter what his income/expenses is. What state? There are child support calculators to figure out how much the judge should order.

SSDI- Again, if he is the primary parent, he can fill out the paperwork and the payments will go to him since child lives with him most of the time. This does not count as child support. Any payments he will have to say how it is spent for child at the end of each year. Is this for the child's disability?

Medical- If he can not get insurance through a job, then he would need to take you to court and have them order you to get it (you may get credit to child support if you add her) or he applies for the state insurance for child, and the state will come after you.

Either way, yes he is supposed to inform you of major issues but these two forms he signed as the primary parent. You have joint legal (to pick a school, decide on an operation) but every day stuff sounds like he is primary unless you have joint PYHSICAL custody (not just joint LEGAL custody- big difference).

And...nothing will happen to him...they will figure out both the issues, make an new order and move on. Family court rarely punishes a parent. If he did not list you on the SS paperwork and it is your child's claim, go down to their office, bring proof you are the mother (birth certificate and court papers) and get it added. But the claim will still go to the father. You can try to get some credit for the months in the summer you have her and he will be getting those payments or you can get it court ordered that a certain amount will be put into a savings account for child that can not be touched until age XX.

mommy nurse

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Re: We have joint legal custody but....
« Reply #2 on: Sep 04, 2012, 11:17:52 PM »
Case is in CA.  Our daughter was diagnosed to have mild autism.  That's why he filed for SSDI.  Isn't it that CSSD will be triggered to get him when his SSDI claims starts flowing?  I mean his case from his 2 previous child for child support.  Not from me as child support.  I still strongly believe that either I will get more time with her or 50/50 when we go back to court.  With the declarations I got from other parents who witnessed child abuse including the neglectful actions he  had committed to our daughter, I wish the judge will see the truth and pattern of his behavior and parasitic lifestyle. 

At the same time, i have doubts because of his manipulation and exploitation of the system.  He refuses to register his so called child care business, refuses to seek work and receives welfare.  He lives with his ex whom they have a child together who is now 18 but still living with them.  He was able to get away from a lot of things for a very long time. 

Another question, what are the grounds for a driver's license to be suspended when it comes to non payment of child support?  How come there is no action done against him for non payment of his back child support?  He had his DL suspended once but was reinstated. 

ocean

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Re: We have joint legal custody but....
« Reply #3 on: Sep 05, 2012, 05:02:19 AM »
Since the SSDI money is for your child and will be in your child's name (with his name so he can cash check or have it direct deposit) they will not garnish it for the other children. That money is specifically for your child only and not income to him.

You are worrying about the other child support. Not your concern if he owes money to the other children's mother. But to answer your question, here, usually you have to owe a lot to get your license and passport taking away, however when he went to court, he probably made a deal to keep it and made one payment.

You will have to file a petition and add it to this court case to deal with the SSDI money and how it will be split. SSDI will give it to the parent who the child resides in the most throughout the year.

mommy nurse

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Re: We have joint legal custody but....
« Reply #4 on: Sep 05, 2012, 08:11:12 AM »
Since the SSDI money is for your child and will be in your child's name (with his name so he can cash check or have it direct deposit) they will not garnish it for the other children. That money is specifically for your child only and not income to him.

You are worrying about the other child support. Not your concern if he owes money to the other children's mother. But to answer your question, here, usually you have to owe a lot to get your license and passport taking away, however when he went to court, he probably made a deal to keep it and made one payment.

You will have to file a petition and add it to this court case to deal with the SSDI money and how it will be split. SSDI will give it to the parent who the child resides in the most throughout the year.

I do understand that it is not my concern if he owes money from other mothers but the fact that he filed for child support from me thru CSSD when CO in April denied that issue, made me think of the crooked system.  If in case I will end up paying child support which I guess will be more than a grand basing on my income against him who refuses to seek work and register his childcare despite of the CO that he is asked to register within 6 months(6months will be October) or find a full time job....I will end up like paying a sitter(that's him) to take care of my daughter when in fact I, as the mother is available wholeheartedly to provide, feed, take care and nurture her own daughter, give her the best care and future. 

With how me and the other moms have been thru, supported him, helped him that we did not even know we were all involved around him...at the same time...who could allow him to still get what he wants?  He would do everything to get money, with his manipulation, sweet words of promises, we were all dealing with the same man,with the same pattern of living, until it was that time to realize he was not building a relationship with anyone but keeping us around for his wn benefit of survival. 

How can i request for a psychological evaluation without money involved?  Do u happen to know any info on this issue?  Despite of all, he had no remorse at all.  He lied so much even in the eyes of the judge. 


mommy nurse

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Re: We have joint legal custody but....
« Reply #5 on: Sep 05, 2012, 08:24:40 AM »
Please note he has 6 children from 6 different women.  Ages, 20,20,18,14,4,1,and 2 1/2 month old.  He owes child support from 2 kids, the other 20 y/o n the 14 y/o.  Now he babysits the newborn. 

 

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