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Update and reading between the lines...

Started by superdad01, Nov 02, 2015, 06:59:41 PM

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superdad01

First thing still trying to recover since this whole thing popped up completely out of left field.

So CPS have been doing their investigation. Were stuck going to moms licensed social worker of choice for now. She was not receptive to a more certified therapist that I suggested. Anyways were going back and forth on how were gonna do visitation. the therapist suggested phone convo instead of visit. I countered with child staying at a mutual friends of ours so I could visit. Child was not interested in doing that. so we decided on phone contact.  Of course I got minimal contact consisting of a few text messages. Then zero contact for the next 5 days.

The following weekend. Child informed me she did not want to come. I told her I would be coming up. I brought a mutual friend to act as a witness and child would not leave the bathroom. I was trying to avoid calling police and making a bigger scene. Mom says she cannot make child go. I inform her it is her job to follow the court order. Child is only 13.  Child seems to think she has the choice in going or staying. Apparently mom is ok with child telling her what she will and will not do.  So we ended up talking child into going to dinner and just hanging out for a few hours. Had a good time and I thought we made some positive movement.  for a couple texts and a phone call on tuesday of the following week.  Contact was once again cut off. No return calls or texts.

So I get a call from therapist today and they mention child is ok coming down to visit if she stays with our mutual friends which is fine with me. Yet I have not gotten a call from the child in 5 days. So I dunno how to read this.

Cps will be finishing up there report this week and therapist wants to meet before that. wants to discuss concerns the child has etc. I gave the therapist an outline of the behavior that we deal with. It included the mom influenced alienating behaviors as well.

I still want to know I am being cleared of any abuse. nothing I have ever done would be labeled as abuse.  I plan on telling her I did not just tell you random things about mom is. i can prove most everything I claim. 


It seems the only one communicatin childs thoughts are mom. She always manages to throw in a negative comment along with it.

MixedBag

Precarious -- I think that's the word -- age....both in Family Court and just plain as a teenager.

Did you get Divorce Poison?

Considering mom is working against you....but a teen is all about a teen....

And this is NOT NORMAL parenting....what makes the teen tick? 

superdad01

Yes I have Divorce Poison. I read when I can.

Mom makes teen tick. It's like the umbilical cord was never cut. What mom says is law. It's been like that for years. For years I'm sure mom has told child what a horrible person I am and I did this or did that. Now it's finally sticking with the child since we dont have the everyday contact like we used to before they moved.  People tell me she will grow out of it and she will eventually see what's really going on, and I used to believe them. Now I'm not so sure.


MixedBag

How far away did mom move away from you?

Look beyond Mom....you said dinner went well...  Teens like to shop...and that will get her talking.

If you can get your teen to talk about themselves, that shell will start to break.

superdad01

My teen does not like shop... I repeat my teen does not like to shop... Well unless her mom takes her.

She moved nearly 100 miles.. 100 miles is the law limit in Michigan.  But she had no intention of moving until the referee said they would recommend me week on /week off joint custody. Then mom who is a registered nurse magically found her a job. She actually claimed she could not find a job locally even though I had stacks of job listings for registered nurses locally.

MixedBag

so....what about the other side...transportation....are you stuck doing all that now?

Hmmm....I still think that you can break the ice with the shopping thing....but ok.

Since Christmas is coming up -- that's a great excuse....  "Show me a few ideas of what I can get you for Christmas this year? 'cause unless you tell me, I have no clue."

superdad01

we split transportation 50/50. One of the reasons why I think they were trying to get it changed with these false allegations of abuse. she was prob tired of dealing with all driving etc,

Good news. Received a call from cps tonight. All charges are being dropped to lack of evidence. Tha's alot of stress off my plate.

MixedBag