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Overnight visits with 2 year old?

Started by FirstTimeMomCA, Jun 07, 2008, 06:24:18 PM

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Marsha

PS.  If dad does take child to a hotel, that would be an adventure for a two year old.  Perhaps you could call before bedtime to "tuck him in".  Give dad a chance to pick out a decent hotel.  Just because its cheap doesn't have to mean its slimey.  And, if your really concerned about it, chip in $20-30 bucks so dad can get a nicer hotel, maybe even with a indoor pool.  That would be FUN and child would love it.

BAZ382

I can see your point of view. 

Fathers should take an interest in being involved in caring for their children but its hard to truly care for a child unless you have independent time with the child.

You can't do that in short one hour to four hour visits especially if they are supervised with the other parent. 

I would be more concerned with his ability and willingness to take on the responsibility rather than your childs age or his involvment in the past.

Remember you are not giving him the chance you are giving your child the chance to know who their father is not just know who he is.

If there is no reason for him not to have your child i.e he's a criminal, drug addict, etc. and he has taken some parenting classes, educated himself about children and how to take care of them (If he hasn't, teach him what you have learned and know) and is willing to spend what time he can.  Let them be together until he proves he can't handle it.  Don't make him wait to prove he can.

Time is precious.  Every minute lost fighting is one less minute a child has a chance to make a connection with their mother or father.  You'll never get the chance to get that moment back.

Does anyone really want their children to grow up and realize the reason they didn't get to spend more time with mom or dad is because one parent didn't think the other was worthy and wasn't willing to help make it happen?

Beatupdad

#22
Quote from: ocean on Jan 27, 2009, 07:59:57 PM
A father should have the same access to his child as the mother "immediately" . Why should the father have to prove anything when you as the mother just get child automatically without any court questions? A child is from BOTH parents and the courts are starting to come around to allow fathers the right to be in their child's life. The fact that the parents are not living together should not matter. Married couples have issues with how the other cares for their infants.

You may not like how he parents but I'm sure he has issues with you too. As long as the child is getting changed and fed, parenting styles do not matter in the courts and shouldn't.


Very well put..I agree unless your spouse did something to cause you any concerns about the safety of your child then there is no reason that he shouldnt be able to watch the child unsupervised and take the child any where he wants..
If your concerned about his financial situation taking him to court aint gonna do nothin but make it worse I dont think there are many divorce lawyers that work pro bono,(especially for a father) and I imagine that if you do go to the court your attorney is going to try and make him pay the court costs YOUR attorney fees and his and all the other miscelaneous charges that are incured during this..
Not to sound demeaning but I think maybe you need to lighten up a little,let the guy be a dad it sounds like hes making  a pretty good effort trying to stay in touch with his kid..
You can bet hes gonna make mistakes like backwards diapers as previously stated to maybe letting the child stay up later than you would,I have had child protective services called on me because the kids needed a bath when the dragon lady came to pick them up..(we had been digging in a river bed ALL day long looking for sharks teeth and fossils and just stuff, )
The DSS worker said look maam they are kids and hes a man lol they gonna get dirty when they are doing things like they were doing lol
Needless to say that steamed the ex and her mom..LOL

Ron