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SD changed her mind ... again!

Started by purrrfectgirl, Jun 30, 2004, 06:56:59 PM

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purrrfectgirl

Dh got this message from SD last night over email:

"Hi!
 
    Hey dad? Could we try me getting to live with you fully all the time  like this summer or soon? Mom just isnt into us enough. At your house we're all like a family."

Now a little background (and I'll try to make it short!).  March of 2003, I got a call from DH's ex neighbor telling us hideous thing about the way ex treats kids (ex made comment to neighbor about OSS "he looks just like his father.  If I had a gun I'd shoot him.  Maybe that's why I don't carry a gun!").  Neighbor refuses to testify in court for fear of ex hurting her.  By last Christmas SD was begging to come live with us.  However, in March ex promised SD horseback riding lessons.  And SD is in love with horses.  We also promised lessons, but not as many as her mom did.  Mom's promise swayed the girl and in April she said she wanted to stay with Mom.  Well needless to say, mom never produced.  And yesterday SD wrote DH this message.  We have not talked to her about it yet since there is no phone/IM contact due to a false DV allegation 2 years ago.  So this does all lead to a question!

If we file for custody and use the regular slow family court channels Mom will mental abuse SD until she relents and agrees to stay with mom.  SD wants to come ASAP, but if we can't get custody change and CS dropped we really can't afford it.  So have any of you ever been thru or know someone who has succeeded in getting emergency temporary custody?  If so, what are good reasons for ETC?  and how long does it take to get from the date of filing?

Thanks for any advice!

Kitty C.

How old is she and how much distance is in between you and BM??

The reason I ask is because, given the 'right circumstances', judges are extremely reluctant to rule against 'a child's feet', if you know what I mean.  Also, when kids run away, the cops are usually called, but if it happens too frequently, they won't go against a child's feet, either.
Handle every stressful situation like a dog........if you can't play with it or eat it, pee on it and walk away.......

purrrfectgirl

SD turned 12 last December.  BM is a very convincing liar and her two brother don't want to move.  At 12 will they seperate SD from her two older brothers because SD doesn't like mom anymore.  In Ohio (where we're at) the rules say a child can't techinically pick until 16.  But the judge will "consider" the child's wishes before that.  Also, any idea how long the process would take?

purrrfectgirl

BM lives about 25 minutes away from us, but she actually doesn't know where we live.  After her false DV charges, DH and I moved into our current home and changed exchange point to another location.  We have a mailbox (at UPS store) for correspondence and there is no exchange of phone numbers.  Kids have my cell phone in case of an emergency and grandma and grandpa's phone number.

leskash

IMHO - NOT LEGAL ADVICE, JUST MY OPINION

In my work (paralegal in WA), it is hard to get an Emergency order w/o showing something major which unfortunately this does not sound like it is.  especially if you SD wavers etc.

the process for change of custody is long.  Does she live in the same school district as you?  YOu might be able to get more days with her still having primary temporarily while waiting for the final order.  YOu would likely still have to pay the full CS amount though.